Insecurities (S.S.)

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I was wrapped up in my favorite blanket, in my own world. I was letting every inch of my feelings go, as the tears continually streamed down my face. "Y/N?" I heard Sebastian come in. Fuck. I'm screwed.

I chose not to respond, knowing he would know I was crying the minute I spoke up. His footsteps trailed around my apartment, trying to find me. Slowly, he pushed open my bedroom door. I couldn't see him but soon enough he said, "Darling." he was right by my side in less than a few seconds and wrapped his arms around my torso but I quickly moved away. "What's wrong."

"Nothing," I mumbled. He sighed.

"It's obviously not nothing."

"It's stupid Seb."

"No baby girl it's not." I sighed and sat up. It was the first time he saw me crying and when I tell you I'm an ugly crier, I mean it. His face was laced with concern and sympathy as one of his hands brushed itself down my face. "Tell me what it is."

"I know I'm not good enough for you because I'm fat and you're absolutely gorgeous and I don't know why you would want because you deserve someone so much better than me." He stared at me for a second.

"Who called you fat?" He asked.

"Myself," He gave a confused look, "And people online."

"Baby you're absolutely not fat." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Seb I'm a size 6."

"And that's not fat. At all."

"But you could easily get a size 2 model."

"I don't want a size 2 model," he admitted, "I want you." He gave me a long kiss before releasing. "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen and don't let anyone tell you otherwise." I lightly nodded at his kind words.

"I'm going to take a shower and freshen up a bit," I said getting up. He nodded and lightly smiled. I walked into my bathroom and took off my sweatpants and sweatshirt. I look like a pig, I told myself, a 155-pound pig. I had two small fat rolls right above my hips, and a stomach one could be mistaken for a 3 months pregnant woman. Thank goodness Sebastian had yet to see my body. As more teras streamed I heard Sebastian knock.

"Doll?" He asked.

"Yes?" I tried my best to seem alright.

"Can I come in?" I wasn't sure how to react. Yes, I wanted Sebastian to come in. We had been dating for 4 months. But with the way I looked at myself, I didn't want him to. I could see Sebastian slowly come in. I didn't even try to cover myself up. "Mind if I join you?" he asked before looking at me.

"Sure." I lightly smiled. He turned around and saw me in the mirror. His mouth dropped.

"You look-" He began, "Stunning." he crept up being me, putting his hand on my waist. I lightly smiled.

"Thanks."

"Now ready to shower?" He asked and kissed me. I nodded my head. 

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