peter parker imagines!

42a | moonlight tears (blurb)

summary: depression took you away from yourself, but peter didn't let it take you away from him

warnings: ANGST???????? I'M SORRY JFKJSDHKA !!!!!!!ALSO!!!!!!!!!!!! in this one the reader has depression. if you've dealt with anything like this or this is a trigger for you, please note that and take whatever action necessary. and by all means, FEEL FREE TO COMMENT IF YOU'RE GOING THROUGH SOMETHING AND/OR WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE! as most of y'all know, i try to reply to most of my comments, and i will for sure do my best to reply to every single comment on this paragraph. <33333333

requested by fourblueyes !! sorry i tweaked your request a little bit but i hope you enjoy!

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ever since the diagnosis- hell, even before- it had become routine. your window would be unlocked, cracked slightly, an extra pair of clean and comfy clothes laid out on the dresser. 

and those simple efforts were all you had in you. 

peter would usually come in around eleven or twelve, tired and helpless look on his face as he rips off his mask and looks over at you, usually donned in a sweatshirt and staring at him with dull eyes. nevertheless, it was the little spark in them that appeared whenever you looked at peter that kept him content. 

tonight was no different. 

the boy carefully slides through the window, landing on your wooden floors with a light thud and small creak as he steps forward, pulling the mask off his face to reveal a matted and unruly head of curls. a slightly surprised look paints his face for just a second before he tears the expression away. 

you weren't usually crying. 

peter knew that depression wasn't just constant sadness; it was more the feeling of- well- not feeling. being numb. as soon as you started acting off, he'd taken the case to dr. google, making sure to only click on websites ending in ".edu" or ".org" in a fit of determination to get reliable information on your symptoms. 

his body slumps slightly as he gives you a sympathetic look, quickly slipping off the suit and into the pair of clothes you'd lain out. 

"okay, c'mere," he whispers, crawling onto the bed next to you and pulling the covers, the two of you assuming your usual position. 

you sniffle quietly, easing into the curve of peter's body and resting your head against his chest. you don't notice when your tears begin to wet the boy's shirt. 

"what happened?"

a sob erupts from your mouth. peter immediately scrunches his eyes shut in a silent groan of why the fuck did i say that? the boy regains himself and holds you tighter, gently running his fingers through your hair. while the action makes you soften, you can't help but begin to let it all out. you'd lost control. 

a few minutes pass before you finally swallow a gulp of air, coughing slightly. "nothing happened. that's the problem."

peter's heart breaks. as if it wasn't broken enough at the sight of you, numb, but doing your best every day. 

the two of you lay there until sleep takes you, peter having an almost completely restless night as he worries about you. 

still, he holds you in a desperate attempt to take the pain away. 

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ANGST ANGST ANGST

a/n i'm literally waiting to post this until i finish the next one so that y'all aren't left sad LMAO

so once i publish this expect a fluffier, happier one in the next few minutes ish lol