Ch. 10: Charlie?

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I woke up to the movement of Charlie wrapping his arm around my waist and buring his nose in my soft black curls. I pressed closer to his bare chest without opening my eyes. He chuckled at my action. He started running his finger down my spine which caused me to shiver in pleasure. I turned to face him. I peered up into his brown eyes that smiled into mine. I bit my bottom lip as I realized what we did last night. Charlie was studying my face trying to decipher what was on my mind.

"What's wrong doll?",he asked me tenderly while caressing my face. I moved closer into his warm, hard arms. I sighed. I knew that he wants to know no matter what. I should tell him. I just don't know how he's going to take it. He gently cupped my face with his warm, ruff brown hand. He didn't say anything until I finally met his eyes.

"Esme.", he said it completely serious. I wanted to cry there and then. How would he react to me not wanting what we did last night.

"It's just I promised myself...",I lost it and started sobbing into Charlie's chest. He didn't say anything instead he hugged me tighter until I pulled away from his embrace. I sat up wrapping the bed sheet around my naked body. I got up to leave, but he grabbed my wrist.

"What did you promise yourself?",he asked looking at me with bewilderment. I couldn't tell him home much I hated myself. How much I regret coming to this stupid city. Nothing but bad can come out of this trip even this relationship with Charlie. My Charlie. We are going to get killed and It'll be all my fault.

"Esmeralda.", he said my name with such seriousness I knew I had to.

"This.",I said gesturing to the bed a few moments ago we were cuddling in. He let go of my wrist and sat down on the sheets we were in last night. How can I explain this to him without making it sound horrible. He ran his hand through his brown hair.

He picked his clothes off the ground and started putting his underwear on.

"What are you doing?", I said looking at his brown eyes while he was getting dressed. He couldn't be leaving without me explaining what I mean.

"I'm leaving.",he said coldly while putting his pants on not even looking at me. He couldn't be serious. How can he just walk away after last night.

"So we have sex and you leave.", I said looking at him with watery eyes. He looked up at me with cold uncaring eyes. He was dead serious about leaving me. How could he do this? Why would he treat me like a hore and defend me when I was going to be raped? Did he just want me for himself.

"No. We have sex, you regret it and I leave.", he said with rage.

He look at me full of pent up rage and probably disgust. How could he think that I'll regret? I don't regret doing it with him. It's the idea of doing it without being married. He started buttoning up his white shirt. He really believes that I regret it.

"I don't regret it.",I said with full of sincerity. I moved closer to him until we were two feet apart,"Do you?" I looked down afraid of his reply.

Tears were invading my eyes and threatening to spill over. He lifted her chin with my hand and saw tears in my eyes. He wiped them off my cheek with his fingers as he cupped my face in his hand.

"No. Of course not.",he wrapped his arms around me. I involuntarily whimpered in his arms. I didn't knee if I should believe him. He sighed pulling himself away. "So what do you mean when you said you promised yourself not to do this."

"That I didn't want to have sex.",I said while wiping my tears off mycheeks. He sat down with my shirt half buttoned up. Rubbing his eyes with his hands trying to process what I was saying.

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