I Don't Want to Hurt You {Mark x WinterSoldierReader}

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(Y/n) P.O.V.

I adjusted the mask on my face. I was scouting the area on the roof of a building when I spotted my target. A man named Mark Fischbach. I wasn't sure on what grounds he was targeted, but it wasn't my place to ask. I'm a machine. A weapon for Hydra. After the Winter Soldier woke up a long time ago, I took his place as their lead assassin. I watch the target get into the passenger side of a car, looking strangely nervous. It started move towards my building. I wait in a ready position for it to get close. Once it's in the right spot, I jump off the side of the building, landing on the roof of the car. Who ever the driver is starts swerving slightly before readjusting and speeding up to try and knock me off. I jab two metal spike into the hood as the car makes a sharp turn. I swing off the side and into the window.

Glass shattered everywhere. "Oh shit!" My target screams. I look over at the driver, thinking that I'd have to kill them too to avoid witnesses. Except we have an issue. I know why he's a target now. He must bait from the Avengers. Because guess who's behind the wheel...fucking Steve Rodgers. No time to hesitate. I pull a gun out from my pocket, aiming it my target. The Captain pulls up his shield, blocking the bullets from the target. They ricochet off the shield back towards me. Luckily I have bulletproof gear. I lean out the broken window, grabbing the hooks, and hoist myself onto the roof. I shoot through the roof, the bullets easily gliding through. Cap uses his shield again, but with the new holes, I take the hooks and rip the roof off. The target screams in fright as they all do, at first, but it turns into a look of pain. It confuses me. I smirk down at him, not that he can see it. I don't pay attention to where the speeding car is going as I reach down to grab him.

The car swerves, the car tilting enough that I fall off the car. Before I can race after the car getting away, I'm faced with the previous Winter Soldier. "Back down, soldier. You're in my way." I tell him harshly. He shakes his head, raising his unarmed hands. "I won't fight you, (Y/n). You know me. Bucky. Your brother. And Steve. Remember Steve? He couldn't win in a fight for the life of him, but he always wanted to join the army. Remember how we would find him. You'd give Steve an earful while I got whoever go away. Remember how sad you were when I went to war? Remember that before I left with Steve, you gave me the charm from your favorite necklace. I put it on my dog tags." He holds up the tags, and I see the little deer charm. He's in my way. I don't know him. Why aren't I attacking him? He's in my way. Why can't I fight him? Why don't I want to fight him? What's happening? "No, no, I don't know you. I don't Steve. That's not mine, that's someone else's. I'm a machine, and nothing more." I fall to my knees, talking mostly to myself. "I'm a machine." I whisper to myself over and over.

The Winter Soldier walks closer. "(Y/n)-" "Stop, that's not my name." "They're trying to break you. Don't let them, this isn't who you are. You don't want to come back because you're afraid to face the things you did, but you need to come home. You were somehow captured by Hydra, and we're frozen and tested on. You broke away for awhile, and you met Mark. You were happy before they got you again." Once he gets too close, I grab him. We tumble around for a few minutes, but I can tell he is holding back. I get him into a tight headlock. "(Y/n) you need to come home. For Mark. He loves you, he needs you to wake up." He wheezes out. I stop, loosening my grip on the Winter Soldier. All these memories flash back to me. Yelling at Steve, crying for Bucky, my capture, my freedom. And Mark. When I met Mark, how I tried to push him away to protect him, when he first told me he loved me and I told him I loved him, how he broke me down so I'd be with with, our first date, every morning when we woke up, his smile, his kind eyes. Everything about him. Everything fell into place, and I remembered. They wanted me to kill Mark because he would free me. "Bucky?"

~~~~~

I walk up to those steps. It's been a few months. I'd been afraid to face Mark. I love him so much it hurts, but I tried to kill him. I almost hurt him. I hurt so many people. Innocent people. I didn't know how to cope. I still don't, not really, but Bucky has been helping. As well as Steve. But at this point, I needed Mark. I'm so scared though. I look back at Bucky in the car. He nods encouragingly. My nerves sky rocket as I ring the doorbell. They'd been keeping Mark updated on me. It was my choice to stay away from him. I hope he isn't mad about that. I hope he can forgive me. The door swings open. I hear him give a sharp intake of breath. "(Y/n)?" I nod nervously. Tears prick his eyes. "My (Y/n)?" I nod again. He wordlessly pulls me into a deep and passionate kiss. When we break I start sobbing. I break down, and bury my head in his chest. "I'm so sorry, Mark. I don't want to hurt you, I'm so sorry, please forgive me. I love you so much. I'm sorry, Mark, I'm so sorry." He shushes next quietly. "I know, (Y/n). I know it wasn't you." "But Mark, it was me. I did those things. I hurt so many people, I almost hurt you." "No, Hydra did this. This is not on you. You're okay, I forgive you. I love you too."

I don't stop crying. "Why, why, why? Don't forgive me, hate me. I deserve it. I don't deserve your love. And that fact hurts. God, it hurts so much. How can you forgive me when I did those unspeakable acts? I'm a monster." He holds my face in his hands. "No, (Y/n), no. I could never hate you. You're amazing (Y/n), you deserve so much. You're not a monster, you're my amazing, beautiful, wonderful girlfriend. And I love you." He kisses my forehead. I take a deep breath to calm myself a bit. "I'm home."

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