Prepsworth Academy

Chapter 18 - "We're at Prepsworth, remember?"

Lily

When I woke up the morning after the fight, I knew what I had to do. I needed to face the thing that had changed me, changed what I thought about everything. Something that could ruin me, and something that had scared for so long. Something I'd hid from, tried to ignore, to push aside. But no more. It was time to stop running and start facing the world, whatever the consequences. Time to tell the truth.

I walked towards the senior boys' dorm, fiddling nervously with my hair, a habit from my childhood that I hadn't done in years. I knew that Tom would be outside, having finished his morning run and exercise routine. I was right on time, waiting by the door when Tom jogged around the corner.

I gulped and tightened my features, forcing an uneasy smile on my face.

"Tom! What a surprise to see you here." I exclaimed, twisting my hands together. Tom stopped, ran a hand through his already messy hair and frowned at me. I tried to widen my smile, but Tom just stepped forward to push past me and go into the dorm. I stepped to the side, blocking the door, and dropped the smile of my face.

"What the hell do you want?" Tom asked sharply.

"I need to talk to you. It's an explanation." I murmured, staring at the ground and well aware that Tom could just ignore me after what I'd texted him. Tom took a deep breath, as if to contain his anger,

"Fine." He replied shortly. I took a long, deep breath., trying to prepare myself to what came ahead. Question floated through my brain and I wondered how Tom would react. I led him to a patch of grass a little way off from the dorm, and sat down, pushing my hair behind my shoulders.The early morning dew made the grass wet as I crossed my legs and fingered a frost-tinged flower that was one of the many that dotted the lush grass. I focused on the tiny shards of ice glittering on the flower, instead of looking at Tom.

"I guess I have a secret. It's why I broke up with you." I began, murmuring whatever I could that wluld stall what I was about to say.

"I gathered that." Tom said sharply and I stared intently at the flower, spinning it around, before bringing it to my lips. I blew out a breath, sending the tiny shards of ice out into the air, briefly catching the light and glinting with sunlight, before falling into the glass. Satisfied, I lifted my eyes to Tom.

"Tom – I'm gay."

Tom

What? My mind exploded, taking the world with it. Memories and secrets and rumours swirled through my head, trying to find any clues that Lily was a lesbian. Whatever I was expecting, it was not that. Lily started talking again, still staring at that stupid flower.

"I wasn't going to tell anyone. I used to kind of hope that it would just go away but then I realised it wouldn't and that it wasn't... it wasn't bad. That it was who I am and I couldn't change it, no matter how hard I tried." Lily's words came out in a rush, like she was scared of what I might say. I couldn't say anything, didn't know what to say. I sat there like a fish, just hopelessly opening and closing my mouth and staring at Lily.

"When did you know?" I was finally able to ask. Lily shrugged.

"Around Year Nine." She answered. I nodded, being silent for a while.

"Aren't your parents against all of that?" I asked. Lily raised her eyebrows.

"Homophobic, you mean? Yeah, they are. It's particularly fun at dinner table rants." Lily said, frowning.

"Does anyone else know? Final question, I promise." I asked. Lily shook her head.

"We're at Prepsworth, remember. If anyone knew, everyone would and they'd all avoid me like I had the plague." Lily said bitterly. I nodded slowly, before looking up at Lily.