Don't Mask, Don't Tell

Chapter 7

I splash cold water on my face before turning the shower off. My failed attempt at sleep resulted in only three hours of rest, and I try to find the energy to wake up.

Fuck mornings!

I throw my towel around me and quickly begin my daily regimen. Per usual, I keep my makeup simple and blow dry my hair straight, using my straightener to tame any pesky flyaways.

This is as good as it's going to get today...

In an effort to feel sexy, I put on my white lace lingerie set and slip on my favorite black pencil skirt. I tuck in my silk ivory cap-sleeved blouse, trying to look professional. While putting in my pearl earrings, I search the room for the high heels that Eliza bought me last Valentine's Day.

Yes, we buy each other Valentine's Day gifts.

I find the black pointed-toe red bottom pumps on my closet floor and slide the shiny heels on.

I give myself a once-over in the mirror. I don't look half-bad, apart from the bags under my eyes. Maybe I should use some more concealer? I throw the tube in my purse and grab a blazer for the meeting.

Making my way to the living room, I find sleeping beauty still passed out on the couch, with her phone in her hand. I set a timer for her on the coffee pot and head to work.

I stop in my office to drop my laptop bag before heading to the seventy-fifth floor and do my best to control my nerves.

Maybe Liza is right? Maybe this is just about the project I have been working on?

Ding!

As the elevator opens, I see Penny waving from a distance.

"Hi, honey! You can head on back, Mr. Alvarez is ready for you."

I nervously nod and make my way towards Frank's office, while the knot in my stomach tightens.

When I was in school, I spent a lot of time in the Principal's office. The adolescent brain couldn't comprehend compassion, so I spent a lot of time alone. My clothes were always too small and rarely clean. I was an easy target for the mean girls of elementary school. I tried to keep my distance until it became too much.

Everyone has a breaking point.

The day Rebecca White got in my face and made fun of my dead parents was the day that I snapped. I didn't even really know my parents because they died when I was very young, but she made it sound like they had chosen to abandon me. Those were fighting words...

I scoped out my surroundings, making sure administrators weren't present. Tears filled my eyes as my fist connected with her smug face. The hit came a lot quicker than we both expected as she looked at me in astonishment. It was a stern blow to the nose and her confidence.

Before she could even react, the Principal was already behind me, yanking me into his office. I recall glancing over my shoulder and seeing the pool of blood collecting at her feet. Her nose was definitely broken, my foster brother Ricky had taught me well.

From that day forward, most kids left me alone, but the cruel jokes and rumors never subsided, and my school work suffered. I changed schools frequently as my foster families differed, but the kids and Principals always acted the same.

Now, even years later, every time I am asked to unexpectedly meet with someone in leadership, I feel that same anxiety surface. I have a fear of failure and disappointing others, especially when it comes to Frank. He's the closest thing I have to a father and I want to make him proud.