A Hope to Lose (Friend Series #2)

Chapter 31

If I'm going to ask my friends to rate my stupidity they would probably give me the highest rating. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pagdating sa kanya nabobobo ako.

Habang nagdi-dinner kami kanina kasama ang pamilya namin ay hindi namin napag-usapan ang tungkol sa pagiging late ni Harvey. No one dared to bring that topic. Marahil ay napansin nila na masyadong sensitibo ang paksang 'yon kaya wala ni isa sa kanila ang bumuhay pa ng usaping iyon.

The only thing I noticed on our dinner was the unending glare of my brother to Harvey. Mas galit pa ito kaysa sa'kin. O baka nasama na rin ang paglilihim namin sa kanya. But Harvey seemed not to care with Kuya's rage on him. He never left his eyes on me the whole dinner.

Pagkatapos ng dinner ay ipinagpaalam niya ako kina Mama at Papa. Tahimik lang kami buong biyahe kaya nang tumigil kami sa airport na pagmamay-ari ni Kuya Hayden ay hindi ko mapigilang magtanong.

"Anong gagawin natin dito?" I asked while he's unbuckling my seatbelt.

"Peace offering, Sof." sabi niya saka kinuha ang kamay ko.

"Sorry." Hindi ko alam kung ilang beses na niyang nasabi iyon sa araw na 'to.

I slightly slapped his cheek and chuckled. "It's okay."

He shook his head. "Hindi Sof. Ang laki kong gago."

"I agree with that," Mahina akong natawa. "But I'm not mad. The important thing is you're here with me."

Hinila niya ako palapit sa kanya at niyakap nang mahigpit. "Sorry talaga Sof." he said, frustrated.

I could feel liquids on my neck again. Nagulat ako nang rumehistro sa utak ko kung ano iyon.

"You're crying again?"

"Naiinis ako sa sarili ko. I don't deserve you."

I puckered my lips when I remember Kuya's word earlier. I was heading to Harvey's car when I accidentally heard them conversing. Harvey was leaning against the wall while Kai was sitting on the hood of his car. Tumigil ako sa paglalakad nang marinig kong magsalita si Kuya.

"Hindi mo deserve ang kapatid ko, de Silva."

I thought Harvey's going to disagree with my brother but he didn't. "Alam ko." He agreed with him instead.

"Anong gagawin mo ngayon? Hihiwalayan mo ang kapatid ko?"

Ang tanong ni Kuya ang nagpakaba sa'kin. Why does he have to ask him that?

"Hindi. Bakit ko naman 'yon gagawin? Isang malaking gago at bulag lang ang gagawa no'n."

Kuya hissed. "Tinutukoy ko mo ba ang sarili mo?"

That shut him up. Ilang segundong na walang umimik sa kanilang dalawa.

"Hindi ko gusto ang ipinakita mo kanina. Alam mo naman siguro kung gaano kaimportante sa kanya ang araw na 'to pero balewala lang sa'yo. Doon pa lang, alam ko na agad na wala kang kuwenta."

Ramdam ko ang mabibigat na salita ni Kuya. Hindi iyon para sa'kin pero ako ang nasasaktan.

"Marami ang may gusto sa kapatid ko at 'di hamak na mas gusto ko para sa kanya kaysa sa'yo kaya kung ayaw mong tulungan ko silang makuha ang kapatid ko sa'yo, umayos ka."

Pagkatapos noon ay umalis na si Kuya at mabilis na pinasibad ang kotse niya.

"Nakakahiya sa Kuya mo." Mahinang usal ni Harvey at umalis sa pagkakayakap sa'kin.

I love how my brother protects me but it hurt me seeing him hurting because my brother's protecting me.

"Pasensya ka na, Sof. Ang gago-gago ko. Hindi ko naman intensyon na mahuli ng dating..." he trailed off.

Nagtatampo ako sa kanya dahil palagi na lang ganito. Palagi na lang siyang huli pero habang tumatagal ay naiintindihan ko na ang ugali niya at habang tumatagal ay nasasanay na rin ako. It's not a good practice. Ayokong ganito siya pero hinahayaan ko rin. We both have our shared faults for this. I couldn't blame him.

"Pero tangina kasi. Hindi ako pumuntang track˗"

"Where were you then?" I cut him off.

"Si Gav˗"

"Tss." I rested my head on the headrest of my seat.

"I'm sorry to say this but I don't like Gav." I said with honesty.

Hindi ko naman itinatago ang pagkadisgusto ko sa kanyang kaibigan. Alam naman niya iyon pero sumasama pa rin siya kay Gav at mukhang mas nagiging malapit pa sila sa isa't isa ngayon.

"Saan kayo galing kung ganoon?"

He heaved a sigh. "Sa casino˗"

My brows furrowed. Umalis ako sa pagkakasandal sa aking upuan at mariin siyang tiningnan.

"Were you gambling?" akusa ko sa kanya na kaagad naman niyang 'di sinang-ayunan.

"Hindi. Kanina lang talaga ako pumuntang casino! Nagpasama sa'kin si Gav. Sabi niya trabaho. Hindi ko naman alam na sa casino pala ang trabaho niya." he truthfully said.

If there's one thing I'm sure about Harvey is that he never lies to me. He'd rather choose to keep silent or hide something from me than feed me with lies. Kaya nga palagi niya akong pinapatayan ng cellphone.

"Could you please do me a favor?" I asked. I was a bit hesitant to say this but I know I would regret this if I didn't. "Stay away from Gav." seryoso kong sabi. "Layuan mo na ang kaibigan mong 'yon, Harvey."

I sounded like a bad and selfish girlfriend right now but I don't care.

Tiningnan ko siya at ganoon din siya sa'kin. Hindi kagaya ko ay hindi niya ito siniseryoso.

"Jo!" I called him, frustrated. Na-alarma naman ito nang makita ang namumuo kong pagkasiphayo.

"Oo na." he said and held my hand.

"You sure you're not gambling?" I asked again.

Umiling-iling siya at hinalikan ang likod ng palad ko. "Hindi."

I sighed and nodded my head. "Don't let yourself be controlled with money cuz if you do, money will become the source of all evils."

We became silent after that. We're on the backseat of his car when he opened the roof of his car. Mula rito ay tanaw namin ang nagkikislapang tala sa kalangitan.

"It won't rain today." I stated. He only hummed and hugged me tighter. Then all of a sudden, the sky was ignited by fireworks!

"Oh my god." 'di ko mapigilang maisiwalat habang tinitingnan ang magandang firework display sa itaas. My jaw dropped as I watched it this close.

"I love you babe." I heard him whisper amidst the noise of the fireworks.

"I love you." I sincerely said.

"Huwag mo 'kong iwan Sof, di ko kaya." bulong niya at mas isiniksik pa ang ulo sa aking leeg. I laughed and pinched his cheek. He was so guilty. Kaya kung anu-ano ang iniisip niya.

I cupped his jaw and tilted his head to face me.

"Hey listen, I will never leave you unless you force me to˗"

"Bakit ko naman gagawin 'yon?"

"Then we won't lose each other." I surely said.

"Hinding-hindi." he said before he claimed my lips. I smiled when I felt his love from that kiss.