laconic | sᴀᴛᴏsᴇʀᴇ

25. 》》 Lacuna

❝ (n.) a blank space or missing part.❞

'Final examinations are gonna begin from tomorrow, I'm nervous'

I gripped the pen's tip and turned down from writing further. But, of course, how could the moronic heart follow any of it?

'It sucks how everything was nothing but a game to you'

Grazing the empty page beside mines, a heavy breath left my lips as I fluttered through the pocket diary. His side was always vacant, dry as an unrained patch of soil, an unwritten surface with remaining signs of extinction. Why on earth was I still wasting time writing this piece of crap when no one's there to exchange anymore?

The thing was — to part away was the complicated step, even more when his roots had burrowed themselves them so damn deep, It was beyond the realisms of reasons to pluck them out and move on as though my world was at peace again, because putting sarcastically, it was in pieces.

December was here, and so was the year's unsurprisingly fleeting end.

Lillie's arm fracture had healed to a point where she now could hold a pencil without someone's aid, though whenever she attempted to scribble, there was a seventy five percent chance that it would eventually slip off her grasp. But what mattered the most was that she was constantly giving it her best efforts, and we all were over and above the moon witnessing that. Month long with no usage of a body organ was indeed a painful span of time for her.

A retold version of the accident's story was required to be told for the sake of school records, and we obviously couldn't reveal that I was the main suspect. It could've even expelled me from the campus, which was a punishment I didn't want to be on the list of.

Lillie was brought back to the dorms the very next week she was admitted, the clot on her forehead had healed at quite an incredible pace, but there still was a light scar if one would view closely. According to her though, none of the wounds ached anymore, save for that brief fracture.

May was living in our room once again. She desired to spend more time with Lillie and look out for her along with Misty and Dawn, the other reason she gave for the hasty shift was that she couldn't devotedly immerse herself in studies, thanks to Miette and Shauna, because as you recall, those two girls were perfect epitomes to spoil the heck out of your lined-up routines.

Troubles were off my table ever since Lillie had accepted my nonsensical deeds as 'goof-ups', repeatedly saying that she was okay and things were shaping back to normal.

Or perhaps, it was a work of fiction.

Ash had entirely dropped out of our sights following the day he had pinned me to the wall at the hospital. The last words I heard from him were unrelenting, like dark specks of red on white cotton - tasted like raspberries but gave the stings of a blood clot.

"You're unbelievable."

And when swearing that I had lost my hold on the intoxicating remembrances, his auburn eyes arrive at my heart's doorstep in the form of refreshing after-rain smell, his undying laughters echoes simultaneous to the waterfall roars.

How was I supposed to freaking lock him away when he freaking dwelled within me? It was almost like catching the wind with an insect net.

What has been going on in my mind lately, though, was that revelation. Gladion's revelation about Ash's dad. Mr Ketchum was and still is an underground capitalist. Yet, he has never manufactured his own goods or even dealt them with other companies.

What he basically does is to make the target entrepreneur - especially those who are undergoing endless number of debts and downfall in stocks - sign on some documents, then formulating a masterplan to rob the company that very night, if not, then threatening the CEO to hand over the credit with the help of lethal ammunitions.

No one ever knew how in the world did that man devise such strategy -- but the crime forces were forever in search of his organization, and their wanted posters could be found on almost every police station's notice board in Kanto.

The news had me rattled to the core for about a week. I previously had anticipated Kanto to be much more populated than I had left it years ago - but to witness that half or even more than half of them were turning their tails to dishonesty and carrying out felonies for bloody decks of money was like -- tearing my eyeballs out.

Despite all the chaos my life was stranded in, I looked between the lines at all times. I gave special attention to the details and formed a rough picture of what human nature in actuality was.

I had been assuming the society as the fiery body of Sun, and I - on the contrary - was some nameless planet revolving around their obnoxious stereotypes, and striving to develop. What I had misinterpreted in this scenario was that the society - including the people I'm close to - were in fact the moon.

They had their phases, their own faults, groundbreaking secrets that grew a sapling of self-doubt within them. I wasn't alone suffering from this vicious cycle of lacking trust in self and obnoxiously hiding my problems. I never was and won't be alone.

Every person seems peculiar after getting to know inside out. Nothing ever has a single dynamic. And now that the recognition had dawned over my former delusions, I was observing the world in a different light.

Perhaps, regrettable.