GLEE PREFERENCES

Be Mine // R. Meeks

I often find myself staring at her. God only knows how long I spend, but I always find myself caught up in her eyes. When she speaks, my heart races, when she sings, my heart swoons, and when she simply smiles, my head spins. However, every time I look at her I am reminded that we will only ever just be friends. (Y/N) and I had been best friends since the first week of glee club, and we spend almost every moment together at school, and every second I am reminded that friends are all we're ever going to be. Although she had never explicitly said that, I can just tell.

"Hey," She smiles, sitting down next to me in the choir room. "Do you wanna go get food after rehearsal? I am so hungry."
I turn my head to face her, and she shoots me the most adorable pleading eyes.
"Pleeeaassee?" She giggles.
"(Y/N), of course. Do you just wanna do the usual?" I ask, avoiding eye contact with her in order to keep my composure.
"Nah, how about we go to Breadstix? I wanna do something nice with you since it's Friday and we don't have school tomorrow. U-Unless you have somewhere you need to be after school." She says, resting her hand on my knee, causing my breath to get hitched in my throat.
"Um, yeah." I say, my voice breaking. "Sounds good."

After rehearsal, we walk straight out to the parking lot to her car. Luckily I caught the bus to school today so we were able to just take her car and go, and it also meant we were able to continue our tradition of singing along to the radio at the loudest volume. Today's feature was a series of Adele duets.

When we get to Breadstix, we go inside and sit down in a booth. We both look at the menu, even though we both already know what we want to eat, and then we order. We get so engrossed in conversation that we almost didn't notice the waitress bring our meals out. She places them down on the table and walks away as we thank her, and then I can't help but notice the vibe change between us. My heart begins to race as she seems to be deep in contemplation.

"You know I love you, right?" She says, picking up her fork.
"Aw, yeah (Y/N), and I love you too." I reply smiling before I pick up my own fork and take a bite of my food.
"I never want us to stop hanging out like this Roderick. Never ever." She speaks again.
"Me too." I smile softly but in reality, I'm fighting back tears as it becomes more and more clear that although we were best friends and that wasn't going to change, it meant that she was never going to see me the same way that I see her. More than a friend - I want her to be my forever.
__________

That night I toss and turn, replaying the events of dinner in my head. Every time she touched my hand, or my shoulder, and when she was saying all of those nice things. I couldn't help but feel like I was missing something. There was something else on her mind, I know it, but if she didn't tell me at dinner, chances are she'll never tell me.

"So you had dinner with (Y/N) on Friday night hey?" Spencer smirks, coming up to my locker.
"Yeah man." I reply, with a confused look. "How do you know about that?"
"She told me in study hall last period." Spencer laughs, sensing how uneasy I've just become. "She didn't shut up about it."
"Well yeah, we did have dinner." I continue, clearing my throat and standing up straight.
"You know," Spencer says, holding my locker open. "I think she likes you."
"I don't think so." I spit, immediately. "There is no way she would go for someone like me."
"Hey, Roderick, she never stops talking about you. She totally likes you, and I know you do too." Spencer says, throwing his hands up in defence. "And hey, why wouldn't she go for someone like you? I don't understand what makes you think that."

I roll my eyes at Spencer, "Have you seen her?" I laugh. "She is absolutely stunning. She's perfect... and I'm... this." I say, signalling to myself.
"Hey, Roderick." Spencer says, sternly. "Don't be like that. There is nothing wrong with you. You just gotta realise that yourself. (Y/N), I know that she likes you, it is painfully obvious. Just ask her out."

Before I get the chance to respond, Spencer walks off down the hall, leaving me to contemplate what he said. The thought of (Y/N) liking me, instantly brings a smile to my face and I can feel my face turn bright red. Maybe Spencer was right. Maybe I just needed to ask her.

That was easier said than done though. Every time that I saw her I immediately froze up and found myself unable to get a proper sentence out. Every time we went for food after rehearsal, or if we got together to practice songs for glee club, I was just the biggest mess and I wasn;t sure I was ever going to be able to get myself together.

"Hey," Spencer says, coming up to me in the cafeteria. "It's been a week since we talked. How come you haven't asked her out?"
"I-I don't kn-" I stutter, but Spencer interrupts.
"I don't want to hear excuses." He says. "Just do it man."
"I can't" I say, covering my face with hands.
"Yes you can." Spencer says, sitting down in front of me.
"I'm not like you Spencer. I can't just ask someone out. Especially not my best friend. What if she says no and it ruins our friendship?" I say quickly.
"Woah." Spencer puts his hands out to tell me to slow down. "It's okay to be nervous, but I thought I already said that I know that she won't say no."
"How do you know?" I ask, starting to get edgy about it.
"I. Just. Know." Spencer says, before standing up and walking away.
__________
"Hey (Y/N)," I smile when she sits down next to me in the choir room.
"Hey," she grins. "Do you want to get food again tonight?"
"Um, sure." I reply, noticing Spencer watching from the other side of the room.
"Great.

When rehearsal is over, we leave the choir room, but instead of going straight to her car, she informs me that she needs to get something from her locker, and she races off down the empty hallway to get it.

"Do it." Spencer says, tapping me on the shoulder. "Now."
"Right now?" I ask, nervously.
"Yes right now." He says. "I've gotta go but I will be asking you how it goes so you better do it."
"Okay." I sigh, before Spencer walks off towards the exit.

"Ready to go?" (Y/N) asks, re-emerging from the other hallway.
"Um, yeah." I say, but I don't move.
"You coming?" She giggles, realising that I'm not following behind her.
"Yeah, but I kinda need to tell you something before we go." I say, looking down nervously.
"What is it?" She asks, sounding worried.

I step towards her and take her hands in mine, which only makes her more confused.
"Look, (Y/N), I am in love with you." I say, still looking down. "Like, properly head over heals in love with you, and I have been for ages, and maybe you don't feel the same way and I'm just making a fool out of myself, but I needed to tell you."

As I'm still looking down at the ground, I can't notice the smile on her face.
"I-I shouldn't have said anything." I say, letting go over hands. I go to turn away but she grabs my hand again.
"Roderick, look at me." She says, her voice calm. "Look, at me please."
I take a deep breath and lift my head so that our eyes meet.

"I'm so glad you said something." She says. "Because the truth is that I love you too."
I feel a grin form across my lips as she speaks.
"I love you more than I ever thought I'd be able to express, a-and I've been trying to tell you for weeks, but I didn't think that you'd go for someone like m-"
"Hey," I say, softly, resting my hands on her shoulders. "(Y/N), you are absolutely perfect to me."
"Really?" She asks, smiling again.
"Yes," I chuckle. "Now let's go get some food."
"Okay," she says taking my hand. We take a step forward but then she stops. "Wait, I forgot something." She says.
"What did you forget now?" I ask, laughing a little.
"I forgot to do this." She smirks before leaning up and kissing me softly.
__________
Hey guys,
I hope you're all well. I'm hopefully going to get a few more things up in the next few days. South Australia has just gone into lockdown because we got some new Covid-19 cases so none of us can leave the house apart from a single trip to the supermarket or emergencies. Funnnnn.

Much love,
Will