Nineteen

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"Lexi..."

"LEXI!" I blinked my eyes and saw Emily in front of me, shaking my shoulders. "Lexi, listen to me, take deep breaths with me... Breath in breath out."

I did as she said, looking around, I got my senses back and remembered I was in the bathroom, but this time I was sitting on the floor with my back leaning on the wall. I didn't know how long I blacked out, but Ivy and Vanessa were gone.

"Lexi?" I glanced into Emily's big brown eyes. She put her hands on my cheeks, wiping the tears which I didn't realize fell. "She didn't leave you, Lexi. It wasn't her choice." Emily whispered, looking at me softly. I nodded, calming myself.

Only Kevin and Emily knew about my mother and no one else. When dad and I came back, dad buried himself in work and always been busy, and when I came to high school, I told no one. I kept it to myself and let them make rumors about my mom leaving us or that dad and she got a divorce and others.

Ivy knew about my therapy, but she doesn't know about my mother. I used to go to the therapist because I couldn't control my anger. I had anger issues since I was a kid and after mom things got worse.

It took a lot of time and medicines to get me back on track, and now I tried to control myself so I wouldn't burst again.

"How long was I out for?" I asked, leaning my head on the wall.

"For a few minutes." She whispered. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm good." I sighed.

"Does it hurt?" I frowned. She gestured towards my hand and my eyes widened when I saw it in blood.

"What-" I tried to clench my hand but winced when the pain shot up my arm.

"You punched the mirror," Emily answered looking up, I followed her gaze and saw the mirror with my blood all over it, I didn't have the power to break it, it was just a crack.

"Let's get this clean." She lightly held my wrist, pulling me up, and took me to the sink.

She opened the tap, and when the cold water hit my cracked skin, I flinched. "Shit! That burns!" I winced in pain.

I didn't realize the pain before.

"Did Ivy see this?" I asked wide eyes at Emily. She already knew about my outburst, I didn't want her to witness this too.

"No. She left before you did it." She peeked at me. "When was the last time you blacked out like this?"

"It's been a while," I mumbled and looked at my hand. "That's going to leave a scar."

"We'll go to the nurse's office, I'm sure they'll have something for this." She let go of my hand and grabbed our stuff.

I looked in the mirror and observed my tired face. Ivy got me this time, I haven't lost my senses like this for a while. She seriously got on my nerves with her words.

Facade? I scoffed. I was just doing what my mom told me, 'To be strong and don't let anyone make you feel less'.

My eyes darted around my face, and I adjusted the glasses. Now I really look like Miss Mad, except I didn't have my wig on. Searching around, I found it on the floor and picked it up. I put it on my head again and winced from the pain in my hand.

I inspected my hand. My knuckles were bruised and cut, blood was still coming out of them. I glanced at the mirror which I punched and saw Emily cleaning it.

"We'll just leave quietly." She looked at me and smiled. "No one will notice I'm sure." I watched my friend and remembered the first time we met.

I was in the office to get my schedule on my first day when I met Emily. She was like a fragile new kid standing with her schedule looking confused.

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