ALOMST LOST.

Chapter 19.

Disclaimer – the song is best played when the lyrics are shown at the end of the chapter, the song is by iris and is called "giving in". 

There is also some abuse in this chapter. 

Adrianna's POV.

When we got into the house, he immediately showed me to my 'bedroom', it would never be my room, my room was back in Quantico in my tiny apartment with my fluffy blanket and pictures of Hotch, Jack and Haley along with Gideon, it also had my perfume bottle on the side that rarely got used because I never went out anywhere to really need it. What he did next was grab some nails and hammer, where he got those from, I don't know but he started bolting the window down "I hope you know this is just a safety precaution don't you hunny" he sounded sad as if he knew what he was doing was wrong, but he still continued so obviously not that sad or even remorseful. I nodded, when he turned to look at me, so he knew I had answered but he just turned and smacked me around the face, still having a nail poking between his fingers making a shallow cut along my cheek. Tears sprang to my eyes as I held the side of my face, that was going to bruise, he turned his attitude so quickly "I told you to use your words sweet pea, I don't like hurting you, but it seems to be the only way you learn" his voice was stern and harsh at the beginning but turned soft at the end, "I'm going to sort the rest of the windows and you're going to sit in here, write me a song to play after dinner" and he left, I heard him locking the door.

I slid down the wall into a sitting position, curling into a tiny ball finally allowing myself to cry for the first time in 6 years, the truth is the self-defense was done to protect me from this situation, but I have to be honest with myself it was my emotions that was stopping me from defending myself. I was scared, scared of him hurting me some more, scared of him taking other girls, scared of the team not being able to find me, they would. They would find me I physically told them where to go, I can survive one night, only one, I kept telling myself. I grabbed the notebook and pen writing the first words that come to mind, writing them down.

I'd finished the song and he opened the door, stalking towards me like a predator to its prey and unfortunately, I was the prey in this situation. I stood up stepping back until my back hit the wall. His hand came to my cheek and I flinched away from him, but his thumb traced where he had hit me earlier, it stung when he touched it no doubt it had bruised already, but it would look ugly tomorrow. He placed his head into my neck and wrapped his arms round my body "I missed you" he mumbled, whether it was for me or whether he was saying it for himself, I stood there ridged not wanting to move. After 5 minutes he pulled away and dragged me downstairs where I saw a table set up with two plates with a full serving of pasta on it.

We sat in silence, or well I did he just kept going on about how much he missed me and my beautiful voice and how he couldn't wait to see me play the keyboard that he had set up in the living room and to sing him the song I wrote. I didn't want to play him that song it seemed too personal for him to hear it but in a way, it was directed at him, when I was up there, I had actually written two but one I definitely couldn't play to him, he will think I have betrayed him if he hears it. I was obviously in my head because he was in front of my face clapping his hands trying to break me out of my trance, when he realized I was no longer in it he pulled me up guiding me to the seat in front of the keyboard, where I then placed my notebook onto the correct pages and turned the keyboard on. I began to play,

I'm worn out
I hate this town
We built this house, you tore it down
My heart and soul
My flesh and bone
It was the only home I know

It's sun and dust
Not much to see
But broken trust
That sticks to me
Now you're here
Can't you disappear?
'Cause it's more than I can bear

Oh, don't ask me how I've been
I'm this close to giving in
Oh, don't ask me how I've been
I'm this close to giving in

I'm giving in, I'm giving in, I'm giving in
I let you love me again
I'm giving in, I'm giving in, I'm giving in
I let you love me again

You pull me in
It's sink or swim
And I drowned in everything
No matter what I do
You still get through
My only sin is letting you

Oh, don't ask me how I've been
I'm this close to giving in
Don't ask me how I've been
I'm this close to giving in

I'm giving in, I'm giving in, I'm giving in
I let you love me again
I'm giving in, I'm giving in, I'm giving in
I let you love me again

I had tears in my eyes, I looked up to him to see this sad but animalistic look in his eyes and I knew I had messed up somewhere and now I was being dragged into his bedroom.