ALOMST LOST.

Chapter 33.

There is talk of eating disorders in this chapter. Sorry if it's a trigger, this chapter is more of a filler.

Adrianna's POV.

I could hear this annoying beeping in the background and could feel someone holding onto my hand tightly. "Come on princess, you gotta wake up, if not for me then for Hotch and Jack along with the team Garcia will kill me if you don't wake up" I heard someone say and it just pushed me that bit more to open my eyes. It was bright and white; I knew I was in the hospital it was the only reasonable explanation, but the real question was why I was here? I looked up and saw it was Derek who was holding my hand and he looked like he was close to crying, I felt bad and needed to cheer him up somehow, "Don't go getting all sappy on my now Derek" I croaked out, my throat was dry and sore, it also hurt to talk.

His eyes immediately looked up to mine and got up and hugged me, I whispered sweet things into his ears, he needed to hear them he needed clarification, I knew I had been horrible and unreasonable to the whole team but it's just how I cope. He pulled away and grabbed me a cup with a straw and water in it, to say I was thirsty was an understatement drank the entire thing. "Derek why am I here?" confusion lacing every word, "You don't remember?" he answered my question with a question, and I hated it, he knew that as well.

"I wouldn't ask the question if I did D, and you know I hate answering questions with questions" the first part was teasing and the second more serious. His eyes knew told me I wouldn't like what he was about to say "We told you Gideon left and isn't coming back. You ran out then passed out by Hotch's office. Me and Hotch were calling to you and you just ignored us" his entire demeanor told me he had something else to say but I knew he'd leave it until a more appropriate time. "I don't remember. Gideon promised he'd never leave me and he has, I guess everyone leaves me eventually, next it'll be Hotch and Hayley, then you and Garcia and the whole team and I'll be left all alone" I was crying now which was now something I did involuntarily, ever since Marcus I haven't been able to stop myself from crying like I used to. Maybe I had run out of room to store all the tears.

Derek ran his thumb over my cheeks wiping away the tears, "I'll never leave you Adrianna. Never. Can I ask you a question though?" I nodded hesitantly, I wanted to believe he'd never leave me but the person who I thought would never leave was Gideon and he did so can I really trust anyone anymore. "The doctor says your very underweight. Have you been starving yourself or something" my eyes went wide, the answer was no. "N-no Derek I haven't, you have to believe me" I started "It's just sometimes I forget to eat or can't be bothered to eat so I just don't but it's not purposeful. My head is just so full of so many other things that eating just becomes last priority" my panicked voice trying to justify what I was saying is the truth.

"I believe you baby girl. But you can't just forget to eat you'll do more harm than good" his voice was steady and convincing. Derek was such an important person to me that I hadn't even realized how much I'd missed him over the course of the month. I moved over and tapped the spot next to me. He joined me and I cuddled into his side my head resting on his chest and went back to sleep, listening to his rhythmic heartbeat and using his body heat to make me warmer than the hospital was. I had missed Derek Morgan much more than I think I should have.