𝙖𝙣𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙠𝙮𝙬𝙖𝙡𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙞𝙢𝙖𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨

• the depraved damsel •

   
warning: dark!reader, disturbing themes, mention of major character death

  
  
•

  
  
It was enough to drive you mad.

Your heart was broken. Your soul, gone. Your happiness was but a memory, now.

At first, the nights were never-ending. The darkness felt like it lasted forever, the sunrise always so late. But the cold stayed, no matter what time of year it was. Knowing that he wasn't somewhere nearby, laughing or smiling, crippled you. Knowing you wouldn't hear his voice again, telling you how much he loved you, how beautiful you were to him, how he'd be yours always and forever, shattered you.

Anakin died only once, but you died every day that he was gone.

It was enough to change you.

You couldn't bring yourself to talk to the people around you. The ones who knew him. Not as well as you did, but they knew him all the same. They had heard his voice, they knew his personality, they had been the reason for his smile at one point or another. But he was gone, and all they did was remind you of his absence. They tried to comfort you, but there was a bubbling rage within you whenever you saw them smile or laugh. He was dead because they didn't do enough.

It was enough to make you join the Dark Side.

Palpatine saw flickers of it inside you the day you almost killed Ahsoka Tano. He recognized the unbound rage that threatened to pour out of you, but which only slipped out with words of malice from your mouth.

Obi-Wan held you back the second he saw your lightsaber ignite, but even he couldn't deny that he had only just been able to subdue you. If you had truly tried to break out of his tight clutches, you could have. But Ahsoka wasn't worth it to you. She wasn't worth being the first to die at your will, the first to have her life snatched by your sword, the first soul to be carried on your bloodied hands.

The first would be Windu.

"Admittedly, I wasn't sure that sending Anakin alone was a good idea," Palpatine said to you, feigning regret as he sat opposite you. "But alas; Windu was adamant that Anakin would fulfil the task on his own."

Your blood ran cold at his words. "Windu put Anakin forward?"

He nodded once, choosing his wording carefully. "He was the sole voice of agreement with the idea that Anakin could take Dooku down alone."

Palpatine knew exactly what he was doing. He had spent years watching you, recognizing your true potential which was being stifled by the Jedi Order. He was uncharacteristically blindsided when love blossomed between you and Anakin.

Once a constantly enraged child, you had become a lovesick teenager. Anakin was showing you light and purity and joy, silencing the part of you that was being drawn to the dark. He calmed your rage, ended the storm, replaced the overwhelm with tranquility.

He had to die.

That was the only way Palpatine would keep you attached to his invisible strings. He wasn't elated to see Anakin's own potential snuffed like a flame doused in water, but yours was too great to risk losing. It was Palpatine who seeped in ideas of Anakin taking on Dooku alone to the Council. It was Palpatine who convinced Anakin to fight for his independence.

It was Palpatine who brought Anakin to his untimely death, using Dooku as a puppet for his misdoings. 

"Then Windu made a grave mistake," You told him with an unwavering voice, that familiar anger beginning to boil in your blood.