His Hidden Wife (A Justin Bieber Story)

Chapter Thirty Six

36 – Love shouldn't be selfish

'Today is one of those days when I wish I was a little girl and could climb into my mother's lap and cry until the hurt goes away.'
- Anon.

~*~

Have you gotten to the point of crying that you make this painful, tight sound coming from your throat? That you couldn't even breathe? That your heart constricts to the pain you're feeling?

It was only a few minutes that had passed by but I felt like I was crying for hours. The pain was unbearable. I mean, damn, I should've gotten used to it right? It should not be something out of ordinary. I've been hurt so many times that this should be just a piece of cake.

But I can't stop. I was too broken.

The tears streamed down endlessly. I didn't care that Aruella had seen me in this state. I was too broken to care. She took a seat beside me as she gave me comfort. I would've laugh at the situation though I can't do anything but just cry.

That's all I ever did.

Cry. Fucking cry.

Because even though how much I want to turn the world upside down, nothing would still change. I still can't do anything about Selena being pregnant with...damn! Damn! Damn! I can't say it! No! Thinking. Just saying it out loud only makes it real.

"Andi." Aruella called. I didn't pay any attention to her but just then, I felt my chest tightened, making it harder for me to breathe.

Fvck. And my sickness just needs to intervene.

"Andi. Hey? Hey. Are you okay?"

I tried to control my breathing, to lessen the pain. I held Aruella's hand, grasping it too tightly as I closed my eyes. Forget everything for awhile Andi. Just forget.

"Andi. Hey. Just breathe, okay? Breathe." Aruella stated that I focused on her voice, just looking for something, anything, that I could turn my attention to. "I should call Dr. Mason." She started to stand up but I tightened my grip.

"N-no." I breathed. "I...j-just need...a...minute. Please."

"Okay." I heard her say. Silence filled amongst us that my heavy, ragged breathing was the only thing that resounded throughout the whole house. It was that too quiet. No one said a word which I was thankful for. I soon found myself calming down.

As I slowly opened my eyes, I felt Aruella's sight fixated on me that I faced her. I was a bit surprised to see how worry she was.

She bit her bottom lip. "A-are you okay now?"

I offered her a small smile. "Y-yeah. For now." I whispered.

"Good then." She suddenly looked away and stood up from her seat. She cleared her throat, dusting away to whatever dirt her white dress had with both of her hands. I was well aware that she was uncomfortable to what had happened awhile ago --- I mean, we really aren't the best of friends --- but even so, I couldn't help but to be grateful at her. "So..." she started "I really wasn't expecting this kind of welcome."

I sniffed. "Y-you're early."

"I'm not going to let myself die because of boredom in that hotel Andi."

"Y-you should've rest first."

"I don't rest." She stated, rumbling through her bag and offered me some tissues. I took it. "And besides, I thought I should greet my beloved cousin by being a bitch to her but looks like someone already did that for me."