Goodbye

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"Harry, I can't be with you anymore."

His head whips to face you so fast that his curls smack hard against his cheek, but he doesn't even blink. His green eyes are wide and shaking so badly that you're afraid they might fall out of his skull. His voice is torn, like a broken xylophone. "What?"

You want to drop your gaze, but he doesn't deserve that. He deserves to see your pain, and you deserve to see his. Your voice cracks, "I can't be here. I can't be your girlfriend."

Harry drops everything and rushes towards you, but stops as soon as you hold one hand out. He furrows his eyebrows and tears a hand through his hair, and exclaim sadly, "What do you mean? What did I do? Why are you saying this?"

"You did nothing," you start crying, and he lets a tear slip down his cheek. "You did absolutely nothing. You were perfect. You are perfect."

Harry takes a step closer, his whole body caving towards you. "Then why are you saying this? Tell me you're joking. Tell me this is some sick joke. Tell me–"

"I'm not happy, Harry!" You blurt out. Harry's lips part and he tilts his head back, pressing his eyes shut and his chin drips with his tears. You clamp a hand over your mouth, trying to stop your cries. "I'm not happy."

"What's making you not happy?" Harry sniffs. "I'll...I'll fix it. Whatever's making you angry or sad, I'll get rid of it. I promise. Whatever it is–"

"No, no," you interrupt. "It's....you can't fix it."

He looks at you with utter disbelief. "What do you mean?"

Your lips shake under the weight of all the words you don't say. "I love you, but I'm not happy with you. I can't be with you."

"Right now?" Harry looks at me for reassurance, but I provide him none. He still clammers for it, though. "I'll...We'll take a break, for a week. A month. Whatever you need, okay, kitten?"

"No, I don't think you understand, Haz," you step closer to him, and he doesn't hesitate. He closes the gap between you two and takes your hands in his. That doesn't stop you from saying, "I can't be with you anymore. This isn't a break, this is....this is the end."

Harry's knees buckle, and it's as if I had just shot him in the chest. His green eyes search my eyes for what to say next–what to say to make me change my mind. But again, he finds nothing. All that comes out of his mouth is one question: "Why?"

"I can't be happy and be with you at the same time," you whisper, and he lets out a cry. "Please–"

"I love you so much," he sobs into his hands. "I don't understand. I love you so goddamn much."

"I know," you wrap your arms around Harry's shaking frame and he practically collapses onto you. "I love you too. And maybe we'll meet in a year, or two, or five, and we'll be happy then."

"Please don't go. Please." He's begging.

"I'm sorry."

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