sixty four

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ik you guys were waiting and its frustrating to wait for a story you enjoy so here's an update for u guys 

this chapter is short and kinda bad because i rushed it but i reaaally wanted to get something out for you guys

i just want to let you guys know that i am a person too with many responsibilities. as much as i love this story and writing for you guys, i do have things irl i have to deal with. first, i am a pre med student so my workload is already crazy, second i have a job bc i live alone and have to pay rent. i am no longer that eighth grader in 2014 who updated twice a day, every day. im really sorry that i'm making you guys wait so long for each chapter recently, but i can assure you that when this semester is over, it'll be summer break and i'll def be putting out chapters much faster.

as always, i love u guys sm ! <3 thank you for reading this story <3 

see u guys in the next chapter :))

Becoming a mother was no easy task. The experience of holding your children, laughing with them, and wiping away tears from a scraped knee — none of that could ever prepare for you for their tear-stained faces as they held onto your legs.

Getting them up the aircraft was challenging enough, which consisted of having Isabel's hands feel like they were choking you as you climbed up a rope ladder. It looked the same for Hange, who had Farlan on her back.

You had heard about air vehicles such as this one, mostly from conversations with Pieck, but never did you think you'd see one for yourself. When you took your first step, your knees almost gave in with the fact that you were high up in the air. Thankfully, Isabel's pudgy hands that grasped onto your leg kept you from losing balance.

"Are you really going down there?" Hange looks to you, slipping her coat off subsequently to placing Farlan down, who immediately began running around the new space. He yells for his sister to join him, who only replied with a shake of a head and continued to hold onto you.

"I think I should," you reply. "Levi is down there and—"

"(Y/N)," she interrupts with a hand in the air. "You know Levi, he'll be okay down there. Plus, don't forget that you have children here to look after."

You feel Isabel's grip tighten around your calf, her eyes met yours before you smile, a very reassuring one. Then you look back towards Hange, she's shaking her head.

"(Y/N), you have to stay. You know him well enough to know that he's fine, the rest of the Survey Corps will be with him."

Yes, you knew that very well. Levi was capable of many things, especially since he's survived until now. Half of you says to trust him, as if it was easy to lay your faith upon anything in this world that you lived in. It felt like you knew nothing, but you did know more about Marley than he did, which was enough to drive your worries.

You thought that if the universe brought him back to you — there was no way you'd let him slip away once more. Because it's so odd to have a love like this in a world so ugly, filled with death,  malice, sorrow and mercy is unknown. Trust and love are foreign but here you are with Levi Ackerman so close to you that you'd do anything to assure his life.

So you convince Hange that he needs you but perhaps its more correct to say that you need him. You need him to be alive, to hold you once more as if the world wasn't as hideous as it was, to be the father at the dinner table to complete your perfect dream of a family. 

The world, yes it's frightful, but he made it beautiful. He was always protecting you and you've decided that it was your turn to protect him — the future of you and him.

"Isabel, Farlan!" You call out to the two who you found to be exploring the aircraft. They immediately patter towards you and Hange could only sigh when she realized there was no changing your mind. 

"Mommy?" Farlan questions with a tilted head.

"Be good, always." You kneel down to their height, placing a hand on each of their heads. "Stay here and wait for me, you can do that right?"

They nod, well aware of your more serious voice. 

"(Y/N)," Hange says. "Remember to look out for yourself as well."

You consider this for a moment before you nod. "Of course."

"I'll see you later." There is a sort of melancholy in her voice. It's hard not to notice.

"Look out for them." You mention, gesturing to your children.

She smiles, very softly. "Of course."


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