Twice The Love ....

forgiveness

When I opened my eyes I was all alone. I already knew I was in the hospital. For what I don't know. The last thing I remembered was getting sick in the bathroom at school.

I laid there for a few minutes before I pressed the nurses button.

A nurse and a doctor came in. Both wore a smile on their faces.

" Hello Miss Star... How are you feeling sweetie?" The doctor asked as she checked my pulse.

" I feel a little sick like I have to throw up but other than that I think I feel ok."

" Ok sweetie do you know why you are here with us?"
I shook my head no. She smiled at me but it was a sad smile.

" Well you was poisoned...before you start getting upset let me go into a little more detail...."
I just stared at her. I remember thinking that Vinny poisoned me. My eyes became blurry with the tears from thinking about him hurting me.
" You were giving a very powerful poison that should have killed you with the amount that was given to you..... "
I can't believe Vinny would do this to me.
I looked up from my hands at the doctor.
" Was it Vincent?"

" No ma'am he was actually drugged with a mind altering drug that caused him to do the things he has done over the past week.... Would you like to call him or Mr. Bryson? They left your phone for you."
She dug into her pocket and handed me my phone. I unlocked it and a picture of me and Vinny was open.

" Sweetie before you call there is one more thing. When was your last period?"

I began to think... I haven't had a period in a couple of months....fudge ....
" It's been a couple of months...why?"
I already have a feeling I know why...

" Sweetie you are roughly 9 weeks pregnant..."

I don't know if I am happy or what about this.

" I think you should go ahead and give Mr. Bryson call..." She said as she walked out. The nurse asked me if I needed anything. I shook my head no as I looked at the picture. We were happy once...can we ever be happy together again? I don't know who I should call Vinny or Bryson... Maybe they are together. I doubt it though Bryson was pretty pissed from what I remember seeing before I passed out. Bryson it is....

Ring ring .....

" Star baby...your awake."
" Yeah.. umm can you come and see me I need to talk to you..  well you and Vinny both."
" Ok baby girl we are on our way..  are you hungry?"
" Yes, very" I giggled.
" God it is so wonderful to hear your voice...  We are getting dressed now we will be there in about 15 minutes"
" Ok Daddy"

I laid there watching cartoons waiting on I guess both of the guys to come.
How was I going to tell them about being pregnant... I tryed to think about who's it could be and well it was about three months now that I have been with both of them. Oh God I am a whore.

There was a light knock on the door before it opened.
I watched Bryson walk in like he was some kind of sexy ass model. His eyes showed the worry in them. He came to the side of the bed as I  looked up at him and he pulled me into a much needed hug. He smelt like .... Vinny.. where is Vinny I thought he said we.

" Baby girl I was so afraid of losing you..." The tone of his voice comforted me so much. It was like the love he has for me drowned each word he just spoke.
" How are you feeling?"

" I am umm I ...well feel ok just a little nauseous."
He just gave me a slight smile.

" Someone else what's to see you but he wanted me to make sure you are ok with it."
I know from what the doctor said happened to Vinny and I know I need to tell them both but I was still afraid of him. It was not his fault but... I don't know how I am going to feel seeing him.

" I need to tell you both something and I am so scared Bryson... I ..... "
He placed his huge hand on my cheek and looked me in the eyes...
" We know baby... Vinny knew before we all did. He is hurting... He feels it is all his fault."
How did Vinny know... I couldn't hear that he was hurting....

" But the doctor said..." I began to say before the tears ran down my face.
Bryson wiped the tears away and put his finger on my lips...
" Let's not worry about that right now... Do you want to see him?"

There no hesitation when he asked me. I nodded my head yes...
He walked to the door and opened it motioning for Vinny to come in. Bryson held the door open for him to walk in. His demeanor was different he wasn't walking tall, he held his head down.
He didn't walk to me...he stood a small distance from me as if he was waiting for either me or Bryson to tell him it was okay. Bryson patted him on the back he just looked over to him.
" She is okay...it's ok..." Bryson told him.
I held my hand out for him to come to me...my heart was beating so fast it was almost like I felt like I needed him closer to me... I felt like I needed to be in his arms.
" Daddy, it's ok." He looked at me and began to walk towards me. He handed me the bag he was holding.... Food yay food...I folded me legs and grabbed his hand for him to sit with me. This wasn't the confident man I know he was distance kind of he almost seemed he was submissive. It was like he was depending on Bryson to tell  him what to do.

I laid the bag of food next to me and grabbed him in my arms. He wrapped arms around me placing his head in my neck...
" I am so sorry for what I did... I could have killed you and...." He began to cry.... His cry became loader.

" Daddy we are ok..." He looked up at me..as if he was surprised that I knew.
I looked over at Bryson and looked back at me.... 

" Did the doctor tell you how far along you are baby?" Bryson asked me. I know that both of them know that it could be his....

I pulled Vinny's head back to my chest. This was the hard part for me. I felt like once I said it they both would leave me. If so... I will be okay.... Both me and the angel I have growing in my tummy.
I nodded to him yes....
" I am almost three months..."
Vinny held me tighter...
" Will you ever forgive me Star?"

" Vincent..." He flinched at me calling him that.
" I'm not going to lie... I was scared very scared you had me locked in a room. You held a gun to my head...but after the doctor told about you being drugged it all made since. I know you would have never hurt me... But how did you know about..." I took a deep breath it was almost as if I couldn't say it out loud. It felt like if I said it things would change.
" Me being..... Pregnant?" 

Vinny sat up and looked over at Bryson...
" The first night we got to the house I waited until you got up. You was still out of it. I don't even think you knew yet what was going on. I made you pee in a cup. I had been watching you for a couple of days. You were getting sick almost every morning so I wanted to make sure. I got a test and well..."
He looked down as I he was embarrassed
" I was going to tell you when we left school but....well I fucked that up."

I couldn't say anything...the thought ran through my mind...what if I didn't pass out would I have died would my baby died?
Bryson came and stood by the bed. He grabbed my hand and with the other he hugged Vinny. There friendship is what will hold all of us together. I know Bryson was mad at Vinny. I don't know everything yet.

" Guys what does this mean for us? I messed up and well now I have a child to think of. I will understand if you guys don't want a baby yet. I can move back with my parents and...."
My heart was breaking from what I was saying but what if they aren't ready what if they don't want it. No matter what...I am becoming a mother and my child will come first.
" I will take care of the baby by myself"

Both of them looked at me like I was the most hated person in the world. Maybe it would be best if I just told them both I wanted to leave even though I don't.

" Star my love you will not be doing this by yourself... Vinny and I will be by your side the whole way. You didn't get yourself pregnant...I do believe one of us helped."
Yeah that was the problem...which one. I should have been more responsible and I wasn't.

" It's all my fault Bryson I should have been more careful... With everything going on you guys shouldn't have to worry about a baby...I think it would be better for everyone if I did move back with my parents..." Holding back the tears as I told them.

Vinny didn't say anything... Maybe he knows I was right.