ᴍʏ ᴍɪssɪɴɢ sᴏᴜʟ || ᴛᴀᴇᴊɪɴᴋᴏᴏᴋ ✅

єριѕσ∂є 2

Seokjin had trouble sleeping. He got up early in the morning and was practiced in swallowing a handful of colorful pills with the cold boiled water left overnight. In the bathroom, he was standing in front of the mirror, in which the man was pale and lifeless, with dull eyes.

He threw cold water onto his face, then pulled out the heavy down jacket at the bottom of the suitcase and wrapped himself in it.

When he was about to go out, his mobile phone rang. He was disappointed again. It was not the man he was waiting for, but the doctor who advised him to receive treatment as soon as possible. Seokjin answered with his customary gentle smile, "Thank you. I'll think about it."

It was early, not even eight o'clock yet. The snow might last all night and nobody knew when it stopped. Seokjin walked in the snow for half an hour to the dumpling stall that he had been absent for a long time.

The vendor was going to wind up the day's business, but the moment when he saw Seokjin, he greeted Seokjin with a warm smile, "You haven't been here for quite some time!"

Seokjin sat at the table, smiling, "I've been lazy and inactive since I moved."

The vendor's wife came to add hot water in his cup, and cast a few eyes on Seokjin, feeling a little worried, "Child, you have been overworking haven't you? Look at how skinny you've become."

Seokjin kept smiling without a word. In fact, he was not busy. His health collapsed just for that there was too much weighing on his mind.

A bowl of dumpling. He lowered his head, carefully pressing the floating laver into the hot soup with a spoon. The steaming soup soaked his eyes. For more than a decade, the price here had never changed, but by only a bite, he could find that the dumpling was smaller with fewer fillings.

So was the love between him and Jungkook.

Seokjin had no appetite, but he managed to finish up all the dumpling. He did not dare to look up, because he was afraid that the others would find his eyes wet. Seokjin suddenly remembered the moment when he came to Seoul to make a living with Jungkook. They were very poor at that time. One day, they bought a bowl of dumpling, but both were reluctant to eat. Jungkook refused to move the spoon until Seokjin divided the bowl of dumpling into two portions at last. He still remembered clearly, that day, Jungkook fell all his tears into the bowl and he said, stressing every word, that for this whole life, he would never let Seokjin down.

But the promise was something that while the speaker was casual, the hearer was attentive.

Seokjin thought he could endure the torture brought by the illness, but he still vomited heavily in the public toilet.

How could he not be afraid? He was afraid of loneliness, of disappointment, and of walking in the long corridor of the hospital alone. He sat opposite the doctor, looking down at the potted orchids of the doctor whose surname was Kim.

The doctor advised him to accept chemotherapy early, the earlier the better.

Seokjin kept silent, while the doctor did not push. He managed to control his emotions after a long silence, and he looked up with a slight smile, "I'm afraid of hardship... Especially now that I'm alone by myself. I will not be able to cope with it . Please prescribe more medicine for me and I'll think about it," Seokjin said and smiled weakly.

"Doctor Kim, I've had fewer nosebleeds lately, but my fever is getting worse. The other day when I was sleeping at home, I dreamt that I became a big stove in a trance, with my heart and lungs fried in the pan. I almost thought that I wouldn't get through."

Hearing his words, the doctor suddenly stopped prescribing the medicine. He saw plenty of sad stories of people with terminal illness, so he knew well about their complaint on the unfair life and reluctance to leave the world, but he had never seen such a man like Seokjin, who was wrapped by loneliness all over.

"You are my patient, and I'll always be there for your treatment. It's no big deal. You must always hold onto some form of hope in life, right?" In fact, Doctor Kim was no older than 30. Most people focused their eyes on his experience and ability only because he had great achievements in medical field. Now he was comforting Seokjin, the tone was so relaxing that at the moment he was just like a student who was consoling his schoolmate.

Seokjin smiled more sincerely, but he still said, "I will think about it."

When Seokjin was about to leave, Kim Taehyung insisted on giving Seokjin a pot of orchid in the office, which was valuable but fragile, "Don't let your mind wander around when you're all by yourself. Pick up a new hobby, for example, raising flowers."

Seokjin was in a daze and then declined, "Thank you, doctor, but I don't have any knowledge in raising a flowers... Besides, orchid is such a delicate flower."

"It's not difficult to grow flowers. I hope you decide soon so that I can arrange treatment for you. Once you are better, my flowers will be looked more beautiful." the doctor gave a brief and slightly boxy smile, and then waved his hand.

Seokjin did not think so actually. Only those who love flowers could take good care of them, which was just like what he lacked was, not casual words of comfort from the others.

But half a loaf was better than none.

So, he accepted the flower, asked for a plastic bag to wrap it and then put it in his coat.

For him, there was still some medicine in his home so he went back without any medicine. He had been out for so long that his body was breaking down.