"What we have to lose"

34

The past weeks were an emotional rollercoaster. We attended the races and the results were mixed. We had good ones and not too good ones. Daniel and I stayed the way we were before. It gladly wasn't awkward but it was hard. Hard for my heart but my mind told me it's right. I cried from time to time because I wanted to listen to my heart. Daniel hided it behind his smile but when our eyes met we both knew we were struggling.
We're currently in Hungary, the last race before the summer break. I'm happy to see my parents again. I'll fly to Holland after the race weekend with Max. We knew that our parents know each other and he wants to see his family as well so we fly there together.
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The Hungarian Grand Prix was...Let's not talk about it. Not a result you want before the summer break. Max and Daniel had interviews right now and I was in the hospitality area with Blair. "Girl I hope you'll have your smile back on your face after the break." Blair said. "I hope that as well." I answered. My phone rang because of an appointment. "I have to go, Max and Daniel have their appointments right now, will we see each other before leaving?" I ask and she nods. I hug her goodbye and go to my appointments.
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We left to Monaco that same day. Our flight to Holland goes on Tuesday. As usual we're always in a rush. I'm happy that I will have two weeks off. I tried to sleep on the plane but that didn't work out. I'm not able to calm down even though I need it so desperately.
Back in my apartment I made my laundry, knowing I have to pack again tomorrow. I can't even remember when the last time was that I ate. Was it today? I don't know. I ordered post mates after finishing my laundry.
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I woke up late on Monday, I needed that sleep. While drinking my coffee I looked at my phone and saw a message. Daniel.
He asked me to help him with his washer again and I walked up to his apartment.
"Hey." I said when he opened the door. "Hey and Thank you again." he replied.

Daniel's POV:
I recognized the exhausted look on Amilia's face. It started a few weeks ago, she's probably thinking about us just as much as I am. We managed to act normal. It was tough sometimes but it worked. I'm glad that we have the summer break now because I will see my family in Australia again. Amilia did my laundry and walked out of my bathroom. "All done." she said. I thanked her and our eyes met. In that moment I felt all of her pain. She was definitely struggling with the situation. Her eyes got watery the second I looked at her. I can't see her like that so I pulled her into a hug. When I heard her sobbing into my shirt, the tears fell out of my eyes as well. "Daniel I can't do this anymore, my heart hurts." she said in between her sobs. "I know mine hurts as well. We should listen to our hearts." I said. She lifted her head, our eyes met and so did our lips shortly after. A small but meaningful kiss, full of emotions.
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Amilia's POV:
We listened to our hearts. We were both struggling these last weeks. All of the feelings and emotions that I felt in this kiss were the ones we pushed away. I was so relieved that I cried even harder after our kiss. Daniel pulled me closer and we stood there. Just hugging and crying. We finally made it, letting our heart decide and ignoring our mind.
"I knew we would find each other, at the right time." I said after I calmed down. "Yes, finally." Daniel replied.
I spend the rest of the evening at Daniel's place, we laid on his couch, cuddled up in a blanket and enjoyed our time together. "When are you leaving?" I ask him because I know he'll visit his parents. "Tomorrow how about you?" he asks me back. "Also tomorrow. I'm back on Monday in two weeks." I reply. He nods and tells me he'll come back that same day. "So we finally let our hearts decide and can't see each other for two weeks now?" he asks pouting. I nod with a sad look on my face. "But you'll be extra excited to see me then." I said, hoping I'll cheer him up. "I'm always extra excited." he says, smiling bright. I felt like my heart wants to jump out of my chest.
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I stayed the night at Daniel's and we made our way to the airport together with Max this morning. He didn't say anything but from the look on his face I could tell he knows how Daniel and I decided.
Saying goodbye to Daniel hurted more than I expected, but we'll see each other soon enough.
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