"What we have to lose"

50

For the last time of the season I heard the familiar words »It's lights out and away we go.«. I never overcome the point of being so nervous when all of the lights are about to go out. The start was good overall, neither Daniel or Max lost a position.
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I enjoyed the last race because I looked over to my dad a few times, he was allowed to sit between Christian and the mechanics to see every step they do. The smile I wore on my face was never as bright. My mum talked to Max's parents and Daniel's family sat next to me, enjoying the race as well.
»Daniel, we have to ask you to let Max pass you, his times are slightly better than yours, we think he'll make it to the podium.« I heard through the headphones and let my head fall. It couldn't be more obvious that the team only focused on Max. Daniel did as he was told and I heard Max thanking him over the radio. I truly hope that he'll be in a better place at Renault.
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The race was pretty spectacular and there was a lot going on. It was one of the last two rounds, Max was on P3 and Daniel made it to P4. When they started the last lap, we got ready to go outside. I heard Daniel's race engineer thanking him for this season and how well they worked together. He and the whole team wished him good luck for the following season. Daniel thanked them as well and I could definitely hear a sad tone in both Daniel's and his engineers voice.
»And Lewis Hamilton wins the 2018 world championship in Abu Dhabi, what a race from Sebastian Vettel and Max Vertappen.« was the last thing I heard before I pulled of the headphones.
We arrived at the podium and Max ran over to us and jumped into the crowd. "Congratulations on this really good season Max." I said while hugging him. He smiled at me and thanked me.
The top 3 drivers went into the cool down area and I saw most of the other drivers appearing as well.
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Daniel appeared next to me and he definitely lost a few tears while hugging his team. "You did such a great job baby, I love you." I said and hugged him tightly. He whispered a 'Thank you and I love you too princess' in my ear while holding me. He placed his face in my neck and didn't let go. I think he needs this right now. I caressed his back with my hand and we probably stood there for more than 5 minutes.
He went and hugged his family as well and had a short conversation with them. He came back, hugged my parents and stood next to me while the ceremony took place.
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We drove away from the circuit and back to the hotel to get ready for the drivers party. Since it's the last one for this season everyone is invited, all the families and the whole teams with their families. Daniel took a shower and I changed into another outfit when he walks out of the bathroom. He came up behind me and hugged me. "Tonight we'll party." he said and it sounded like a relief. I turned my head and kissed his cheek. "And then we'll fly back to Monaco and we'll have some time with your family and my parents." I added and he smiled. Our families decided to spend some time with us after the last race so they fly with us to Monaco tomorrow.
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When we arrived it was already really crowded. Everyone was dancing and simply having fun. I talked to so many people I can't even remember. I danced with Blair and Charlotte, but also with Max and Daniel. I was so glad that Daniel coped with the previous season so well. He seems to be so happy right now. »you'll take away his happiness soon.« the thought appears in my head and kinda ruins my mood. I know I promised that I'll tell them but I'm so scared of their reactions. I took another shot and walked back to the dancefloor.
After a while I went to the toilet. I felt dizzy when the light hit me and had to hold onto the sink. I definitely need to slow down a bit. I won't drink anymore and maybe sit down for a little. I went to the toilet and when I washed my hands, I looked at myself in the mirror. I look dead, I didn't realize that until now but it's really bad.
I walked out of the restroom and stopped again, I was exhausted out of nowhere and hold onto the wall. "Hey Are you ok?" Max walked towards me and supported me. "I think I have to go, now." I said to him. "I'll bring you to the hotel and then I'll text Daniel and your Family, you have to tell them...now." Max demanded and I only agreed due to nodding my head.
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I was so glad that Max brought me back to the hotel. I laid down in my bed and Max sat down next to me to comfort me. "Hi Daniel, Max here. I drove Amilia back to the hotel she's not feeling well. Can you do me a favor and come here as well? Bring your and her family." I hear Max say. "Ok Daniel is on his way." he said and I nod.
»I'm about to tell them the truth, I hope they can cope with it. I don't want them to suffer.«
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A/N:
I feel like I never do this but I have to thank you guys. A lot of you vote for every chapter and I appreciate it very much. I'd love to hear from you so comment if you like u try to reply as fast as possible.