"What we have to lose"

74

I am honored to have such great friends and family. I had to stay in the hospital permanently because they were afraid I could go unconscious again. And added to that I hit my head pretty bad the last time. That's another reason why they want to keep me. Blair came all the way from the UK to visit me, just as Lando. I told him that he should spend his free time with his friends instead of sitting here. Just like anyone else he insisted to stay. Charlotte and Charles came to visit me everyday, Max almost spend all his time here and Daniel, he never left my side. I told him more than once that he needs to sleep a full night in his bed at home but he denied it. He told me he wouldn't we able to sleep anyways because he'd be scared that something is going to happen with me.
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Like they told me, they started another therapy for me. I thought it was rough but I never expected it to be this rough. They gave me the IV's once a week and it made me feel sick to my stomach. I'm not able to eat on my own two to three days after the IV, so they give me food over the IV as well. I always needed support, when I had to use the bathroom, wanted to shower, even to just stand up to look out of the window. I felt so bad for it but I soon realized there was no possibility to do it alone. One morning Charlotte was there because I finally persuaded Daniel to go and have breakfast with Max and my parents outside the hospital. Charlotte walked me to the bathroom so I could get ready for the day. While brushing my hair I recognized a lot of hair falling to the ground. It was only the 4th round of my therapy but it hit me hard already. In shock I looked to Charlotte who had the same expression on her face. "Ok that's it, the cancer is not fighting against me, I'm fighting against it. And I'm one step ahead of it. Charlotte we'll chop my hair, right now." I said fully convinced even though I could cry. I loved my long hair and I knew Daniel loved it as well. I grabbed the scissors and handed it to Charlotte, showing her where to cut. " Are you really sure?" she asks and I nod.
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I didn't dare to look into the mirror while Charlotte cut my hair. When she was done, she smiled at me. " This looks really good to be honest, you look damn beautiful Amilia." I turned around and looked into the mirror. It was weird at first but the longer I looked into it, the more I liked it. I hugged her and thanked her for doing this. We walked back into the room and I sat on to the bed. I heard the door open and saw Blair. The moment she realized, she opened her eyes wide. "Omg Girl, you look so hot. The short hair is fire, I think we all have to leave once Daniel sees you." she said with her typical smirk. I'm glad she never changed since I got ill. I laughed at her comment and thanked her. Charles and Lando came back as well and complimented my hair as well. "Props to Charlotte, she could be a hair dresser." I said and smiled at her.

After half an hour later Charlotte and Charles left and in the Same Moment Daniel came back with Max and my parents. Max was the first to say something after they stared at me for a couple of seconds. "Amilia, when did you went to the hair dresser? This looks so good." he said and I explained. My mum hugged me and left some tears because she knew that this was the outcome of the therapy. I told her and my dad the same that I told the others. "I can't believe how strong you are, we are so proud of you." they said.
Daniel was silent the previous minutes. I started to panic because I thought he might hate it. "Amilia." he said and sat down next to me, brushing his hand through my hair. "You hate it do you? You think I look ugly right?" I asked with a shaking voice. "Oh god no I'm sorry I made you think that, it was unexpected but you look beautiful, I really like it." he smiled at me and I pulled him into a hug. "And you look extremely hot I may add." he said and I could hear the smirk in his voice. "Be glad that no one heard that." I said laughing.
I was so happy that he wasn't angry or anything, I was surprised by how much he liked it. And the short hair gave me the confidence I needed, I will win this fight.
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