That night, I was staring at the ceiling above me. My fingers running through my white hair. I kept thinking about how can I help Tobias.
How can I make him feel better?
I felt empty. I felt sick. I wanted to punch myself.
Why do I want to punch myself?
The moonlight from my window shines through my blanket. My room was barely visible now, thanks to the light that the moon provided.
I thought of Tobias. Shit. Why did I think of him? Fuck. Fuck. Why?
I imagined him alone, in his room, curled up and crying. The thought hurts and I hated it. I brushed it away. And then there came another one.
Tobias, still in his room, but he's not crying. He's in his bathroom, leaning on his sink, staring at his reflection. His knuckles are bruised. It's bloody. I hate blood. But I didn't hate Tobias. I didn't hate him at all.
Then there came another one. Tobias was punching the wall of his bedroom. Really fucking hard. He was shouting. I didn't know what he was shouting. But he's hurt. And I felt ashamed again.
Why am I feeling ashamed?
Why am I thinking of Tobias? Because I wanted to. I wanted him to be okay.
Why do I want him to be okay? Because he's my friend. A good friend. And I don't want to see my friend being hurt. Specially when he's the one doing it to himself.
Fuck.
The night slowly revolves. The moon slowly goes away. My room becomes dark. My head is in the clouds. As I wait, I suffocate. I suffocate with my own thoughts. The world is dark but that didn't stop me from getting up.
YOU ARE READING
Elliot
Teen Fiction[Unedited] College freshman Elliot doesn't care much about the world. School, video games, smoking, skateboarding: his life revolves on those things only. He is put into a miserable episode when he had his break up with his girlfriend. But then he m...
