the trip that started it all

Chap.3

Troye and I had to leave early to catch our flight to Sydney for amplify. The rest of his family, including his parents, were taking late flights so I would just be me and him for a few hours or maybe a day. I wasn't really paying attention when they said they're flights were.

I haven't slept a lot in the last few days since I'm always thinking about my sexuality. I've spent some of the last few nights looking at coming out videos, including Troye's. some of them were tear jerkers and some were really sweet ending. other nights, I would just look at the ceiling, thinking.

I looked in the mirror of the airport bathroom and I looked horrible. I had dark circles and they were so obvious. There would most likely going to be fans at the airport in Sydney and every picture I would look absolutely dead.

Troye had told me before hand that he had something to tell me, but at this moment in life, I didn't care. I just wanted sleep without the thoughts that went on before I went to bed.

" Connor, when was the last time you slept?" Troye asked me after he left his bathroom stall.

I splashed some cold water on my face then grabbed a couple paper towels to dry off with. I noticed he still was ' borrowing' my beanie from when he asked in L.A.

" In the car, on the way to your house." I said honestly.

I wanted to tell him last night so he wouldn't worry since that was 3 days ago, but I couldn't. He has this Ora around him that makes you feel safe and understood that makes you feel guilty if you even think about lying.

" on the plane, your getting some rest." he said as he grabbed my hand.

Sweaty palms. why was he grabbing my hand? Friends do this right? Yeah I've done this with friends before. so why did it matter? That question rang in my head as we boarded our flight. it rang and rang and rang till a solution popped into my head. maybe I like Troye. No, Connor. you can't date your best friend. if you broke up, it would ruin the whole friendship.

" Connor? You ok?" Troye said waving his hand in front of my face.

" yeah, yeah. just tired." I said reassuringly. it was half true.

I rested my head on the back of my seat, but eventually laid my head on his shoulders. it just felt like it was meant to be there. as if it was like a puzzle and we were making a beautiful picture each times we touched.
I saw Troye start moving a lot. he must've thought I was asleep because he would try not to move his shoulder. I saw him slowly move his hand over to my knee and gently leave it there. he didn't even look at his hand while he did it. he looked at the tv in the back of the seat in front of him.
After 10 minutes, I started to stir. he quickly moved his hand back to his lap and I sat up straight.

" what did I miss?" I asked, as if I hadn't been awake the whole time.

" we'll be landing shortly. when we get there, do you wanna sleep, eat, tour? It's up to you." he asked with kind eyes.

" I want to sleep then eat then tour. Does that sound good to you?" I replied, making sure he wanted to do it in that order too.

" sounds perfect." he said while stretching.

When we got off the plane, we went to the baggage claim. we found Troyes, but not mine. great, the flight lost my luggage.

" just my luck." I said, clearly annoyed.

" you can borrow some of my clothes before we go shopping." Troye offered, kindheartedly.

" thanks." I replied simply.

We caught a taxi to the hotel and paid when we got out. Troye went up and grabbed our keys to our rooms. he came back with only one key.

" For some reason, they had us under a single room so I guess we're sharing." he said as he smiled and picked up his bag.

We went to the 3rd floor where our room was located and swiped the key down the lock till we saw a green flashing light. the room was absolutely beautiful. there was only one thing wrong with it. the bed. It wasn't 2 beds like I thought id be like. 1 queen sized bed. I don't think this trip will be normal at all. I can't trust myself around troye.

" hey Connor? Can we talk about what I wanted to talk about earlier?" Troye asked with puppy dog eyes, making it impossible to say no.

" sure." I said, playing with the ends of the sleeves.

I sat down next to him and the bed and we both leaned back. we starred at the ceiling till Troye interrupted the silence when he was mentally prepared.

"Ilikeyou." he said rather quickly.

" what?" I asked, making sure I heard him right and was utter disbelief.