the trip that started it all

Chap.51

" Troye, I can't go. I feel sick." I whined pacing back and forth in our bedroom.

" It's just your nerves getting to you." He called from the bathroom.

He walked out, in a black tux and I could feel my jaw drop open. He walked over smiling and but his hand under my chin and pushing it back up.

" I'd probably feel better if I looked as good as you." I sighed.

" You're joking, right? Fangirls are going to scream when they see you on the live stream." He said, wrapping his arms my waist and giving me a reassuring squeeze.

" I forgot it was live." I mumbled.

" Here. Mint calms the nerves." He said, handing me a pack of gum.

" Are you ready to go?" I asked. " Keep in mind we have to pick up my family."

" Yeah. I'm driving to the hotel." He said, grabbing the keys.

I shoved a piece of gum into my mouth with my trembling hands and headed out the door. Both Nicola and Dustin couldn't make which I understand, but I might be calmer if I know Nicola would give me one of her famous hugs.

We arrived at the hotel and Troye and I let my dad with my mom in the passenger seat, leaving Brandon and Troye talking in the back seat right beside me as I looked calm on the outside, but if they could read my mind, they would've heard nothing but eternal screaming.

" Con, just breathe. It's going to be fine." Troye said, putting his hand on my knee.

I nodded and took a deep breathe, holding it for a few seconds then releasing it. I did this over and over, the closer we got, the deeper the breathes got, until we finally got there and I was borderline hyperventilating. I shoved the mint gum into my mouth and Troye took my hand.

" Focus on me if you need to." He said, squeezing my hand.

We got out and walked through the building so we could arrive at the red carpet. I grasped Troye's hand and he turned to face me.

" Ok, this is your night so I'm going to let you have it because I know you'd do that for me. I'm going to be at the end of the carpet waiting for you." He said, rubbing circles into my knuckle while looking me in the eyes.

" But Troye.." I said before getting cut off.

" No. You can do this. All you have to do is talk. You do that all the time at a camera." He said, kissing me on the temple then walking away.

" A camera doesn't talk back." I muttered.

I went through several interviews, mostly talking about what I excepted to happen, making me even more nervous. I met up with Troye and we found our seating arrangement, which sat Troye, my family, and I with Grace, Kian, and JC.

The award show started and I checked several times to see if I was still breathing. It started with many speakers, leading to some awards to people I saw on the red carpet. I tried to focus on the bidding of the wells, but I was just too stressed to tune in.

Then came the moment that made my heart implode on itself. A lady came on through the speakers, but couldn't be seen anywhere and announced the next award.

" and now, to present the governor's award, Youtube sensations Grace Helbig, Kian Lawley, and JC Caylen  ."

They smiled at me as they rose and headed to the stage and I literally just kept my eye on Troye to stay calm till they started talking.

They talked highly of me after being some what awkward and it made me feel better since I always get these random thought of 'what if my friends hate me and are just putting up with me to be nice?'. Grace talked about how many people have followed me over my years, but I didn't care. I cared about the people, not the numbers.

Kian and JC talked about about my subscribers and how I spent my birthday on the thirst project, with Grace making little jokes in between. When I finally thought I'd have to up on stage, they introduced videos of my family. It started with my mother, then going to Brandon with Pree, Troye who made me tear up while kissing me head, Grace, my father, Nicola who made a tear fall out of the rim of my eye by almost crying over how proud she was, and Dustin with his Fiancé, with the final video being a fan, saying I helped him come out.

They called me to the stage and I walked up the steps, being greeted with open arms by my friends. After being handed my award, I started talking and thanking my family and friends.

I walked off stage with Grace, Kian, and JC, to see Troye waiting for me. He walked over and gave me a tight hug spinning us around.

" I am so proud of you." He muttered.

" Thanks, Troye boy." I said while blushing.

We took several pictures after the awards were over and Troye drove me home while my family caught a cab.

We arrived home when suddenly he turned me around and kissed me. I smiled through the kiss before I pulled away.

" What was that for?" I asked happily.

" I just love you so much...and I was wondering something." He said.

" Yes?" I said, waiting for him to continue.

" I want to have a kid." He winced.

" Like now?" I asked.

" Yes. I love you so much and I want to have a child with you. What do you think?" He asked, fumbling with his fingers.

" I think we need to find a local adoption center and figure out exactly what child we want." I said.

" I want a daughter. That's all I care about." Troye said.

" What's a good age? Keep in mind we will be traveling a lot in the next couple of months and a plane is no place for a young child." I said.

" 13 sound good?" He asked.

" Yeah. Let's go to sleep. I'm exhausted." I said.

I climbed into bed and grabbed my computer from the night stand. Troye walked in from the bathroom with only pajama bottoms on and crawled in to bed beside me.

" Whatcha doing, babe?" He asked, leaning his head onto my arm.

" Sitting up an interview at the agency. When's a day you aren't at the studio?" I asked.

" Next tuesday." He said after some thinking.

" Ok.. It's set. Night baby." I said before turning off the lamp an kissing him goodnight.