the trip that started it all

Chap.10

" can you... stay the night? Just so you don't have to get up earlier than you have to." I said looking up at him.

" yeah. I just need to check out of my hotel and get my luggage." he said, getting up from the bed.

I get up with him and wrapped my arms around his tall, slim, and shirtless torso. I separated from him, reluctantly, so he could put his shirt on so he could leave.

" it's 9:30. I should be back by 10." he said, grabbing his keys.

" be safe." I said, hugging him a final time.

" I will." he says, closing the door.

I turned around and realized I Completely neglected my apartment. I had blankets and pillows thrown everywhere. dishes littered the coffee table.

I grabbed the dishes and put them in the dishwater to soak. I folded the blankets and put them on the arm of the couch. I grabbed the pillows and put them in their proper places.

I went back to my room and put the clothes up from today in my closet. I looked at the the time. 9:37. I decided that I could slip into bed and by the time Troye got here, I'd be ready to go to sleep by him.

I crawled underneath the duvet. the sheets smelled of his cologne. I breathed his scent in, but lost it a little more each time. I tried to keep his scent as long a I could, but the sweet scent became lost on me.

}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{

I woke up to the springs in my bed gently squeaking an my bed moving. I looked over at the alarm clock on my nightstand. 11:04.

" hey." I said, turning over to see him.

" sorry. I didn't mean to wake you or being late. The receptionist had trouble with the computer, then there was traffic." He said laying down.

" it's ok." I said snuggling into his chest.

He laid his head on top of mine and we fell asleep.

}{dream}{

I looked around me. I was on a plane, holding troye's hand. the way his hand felt in mine made the butterflies in my stomach flutter harder. the more they fluttered, the brighter the sunset outside glowed.

All of sudden, troye removed his hand. he yelled vulgar things at me, making my eyes fill with tears. the sunset turned into a storm, shaking the plane. the louder troye yelled, the harder the plane shook. it progressed until troye screamed his finally blow.

" I HATE YOU!" He screamed, red faced.

Troyes screams were soon drowned out by the sound of screams of pain, crunching metal, and the planes alert that the plane was going down.

}{ wake up}{

Troye was shaking me with a concerned look on his face. my face was stained with tears.

My body went numb except my hands that tingled. I had to sit up to help my breathing. my heart was pounding so hard I thought it might explode.

After my panic attack, I was still shaking. troye held me tight, which made me feel better.

" are you ok, now?" He asked in a soft voice.

" please don't hate me." I whispered.

" what makes you think I could hate you?" He asked astonished and bringing me closer.

" you said it in my dream. it was the last thing you ever said to me." I sniffled.

" well, dreams are just figures of your imaginations. it's ok. we need to go back to sleep." he said turning off the lamp then squeezing my hand.

I decided to just stay awake since we need to get up in 2 hours. I turned on the tv and clicked through till I found an American horror story episode.

X TIME SKIP:2 HOURS X

Both troye and I were both dressed and ready to go to the airport. I was wearing my chuck Taylor's, red jeans, and an old Minnesota state from college. troye wore his shirt he slept in, blue jeans, and black converse.

" hey Connor, what if we keep something of each other's so if we miss each other, well have that item?" He asked, making sure he had everything he needed in his bag.

" that sounds lovely. what are we going to keep?" I asked.

" I was thinking I keep your beanie for the week and you could keep my sweatshirt because you look awesome in it." he said.

" I like that." I said through a smile.

We got his bag in the car and I drove him to the airport. traffic was bearable for l.a. so we had extra time to seat in the car.

I grabbed his hand and we didn't make eye contact. I thought if we spent more time together, it wouldn't hurt as bad, but it still hurt. I don't know why it hurts. we've been dating only a short while so why does it matter?

The time came where me and Troye had to make a private goodbye because neither of us were good at public goodbyes. I hugged him around the neck and he hugged me around the waist and he stayed like that in the car for god only knows. he finally pulled away and got out. I got out with him and carried his bag tell we got to security.

We did one of the ' straight guy hug pats' hug but whispered goodbye in each other's ear.

I watched as we walked through Security and to the flight attendant who took his ticket. he looked back, smiled, waved then boarded his flight.

I realized why it hurt so bad. it hurts because he matters.