Catch Me | Jin x Reader

Ch 13 | Trembling Hand

Y/N's POV:

"How're the nightmares?"

"They're a little better," you smile shyly, taking a sip of your hot green tea.

"Do they still happen every night?" your therapist asks, taking the lounge chair from across the coffee table.

"Yeah," you look down at your lap. "But last night's dream wasn't too bad. I didn't have a panic attack, I just woke up in tears."

"Can you tell me what this one was about?"

It's been eight days since you were released from the jailhouse. Almost all of the cuts on your face are healed except for a bigger gash still healing on your right cheek and a few cracks on your lips. The bruise over your right eye is still visible. It actually got darker for a bit but it started lightening up three days ago.

You're still having nightmares but you were honest when you said last night's wasn't as bad. Usually the dreams involve you getting jumped by the other inmates or all of your friends leaving you. Your mind even plays tricks on you and you dream about Jin and Ana leaving you too.

"Last night I dreamt the little one was trying to hit me, but this time I hit her back," you answer her.

"That's incredible, [Y/N]," she smiles warmly. "That means that your subconscious mind is finally allowing you to start protecting yourself."

You're still a little awkward with your therapist, but it's getting easier to talk to her each time. This is your fourth session with her. Her name is Eunji and she's fluent in both English and Korean just like you are, so your appointments are usually in English as it's a little more comfortable for you.

Eunji is somewhere in her forties with short black hair that rests just above her shoulders. She has sharp facial features like Taehyung but her eyes are kind, reminding you a little bit of Jimin's.

"Have you had any panic attacks aside from the nightmares?"

"I had one Tuesday night, but Jin was able to talk me off the ledge," you say with flushed cheeks. "It was actually because of Jungkook."

"What happened with Jungkook?" she asks with her brows raised.

"I crossed paths with him in the parking garage after Ana had dropped me off from dinner."

"Did he speak to you?"

"No," you shake your head. "His eyes almost popped out of his head and tears immediately poured down his chubby cheeks. I was able to make it up the elevator and into Jin's apartment before breaking down."

"How do you feel towards Jungkook? And Yoongi?" she asks, writing some notes down on her notepad.

You bite into your cheek, trying to figure out what to say.

"Angry isn't really the right word..." you trail off, looking out the big window of her living room. "I'm mostly just sad and disappointed."

"I think that's fair," she nods. "The rational and empathetic side of you understands just how much pain they had to have been in. But it doesn't make it sting any less."

"Exactly," you say down to your lap.

"Jungkook was unknowingly your rock, and you have every right to be hurt by the things he did and said to you."

Tears brim in your eyes again as you look up at her, remembering all the hatred in his eyes as he slammed you back against the cold cement.

"Is it not a little bit my fault though?" you choke out. "I'm not as hurt by Yoongi as I am JK. Isn't it because I put him up on a pedestal he didn't ask for?"