Forever And A Day || Season 2 || Quinn Fabray Story

47. Close Call in Celibacy Club

Quinn

"This meeting of the Celibacy Club will now come to order. Before we begin, I would just like to start by congratulating you, by reminding you not one member of this club hasn't had an unwanted pregnancy in almost a year" Miss Pillsbury said looking at me and Puck pointedly. "You get tensies for menses! I also would like to welcome our newest member, Noah Puckerman" She said.

I was wondering why Puck was here.

"Are you lost Noah?" Rachel asked him.

"Yeah, you don't belong here, you're the biggest french whore of them all" I said to him.

"Zizes and I were going to make a sex tape. I found out that making that tape would result in my arrest." He said "I've hit rock bottom and I've come here to set myself straight"

"That's just awesome, Noah" Miss Pillsbury said to him "and you're just in time, because tomorrow the girls and I are going to perform a song for Glee Club extolling the benefits of celibacy"

"I'm down for that. Point of order though. While three chicks and me is just a typical Saturday night in the Puckerman bedroom, it's not the best balance for singing. We need at least one more dude" Puck said.

"I've got that covered." Miss Pillsbury said smiling.

**********

The celibacy club had somehow come up with the idea of performing a song for the glee club that shows a different take or a counter argument to this weeks Sex Ed stuff. Which is how we found ourselves on the stage in the auditorium as the rest of the club we scattered around the seats in the first block. They were all looking at us a little funny. Miss Pillsbury had roped her dentist husband Carl into it which made this all the more weirder. We chose the song Afternoon Delight.

Mr Schue and Miss Holiday were laughing at one point during the performance. Rachel was way to into it it was kind of disturbing. When the song ended the rest of the club looked confused and Brittany was the only one who stood up and clapped. I looked over at Ryan and even he looked like he'd been holding back a laugh. He was running his hand through his hair, so I knew something was off with him. It was his 'well this is awkward' reaction.

"Hi! um, Holly here" Ms Holiday said when we were all stood on stage awkwardly. "So, I'm a little confused. Isn't this a strange song for the Celibacy Club to sing?" She asked

"What, why?" Miss Pillsbury asked "It's so wholesome. It was written during the Bicentennial to celebrate America and fireworks, and-" She was cut off.

"No, it's about sneaking out for a nooner" Holly said and the Glee Club laughed, while we all stood on stage completely embarrassed for Miss Pillsbury.

"Yes, exactly! A nooner is when you have a dessert in the middle of the day, right?" She asked "Right Carl"

"Well regardless, great job guys" Mr Schue stepped in "Great number"

"It was fantastic" Miss Pillsbury said.

"Hey Glee Club, Lets go" Mr Schue said as everyone left the auditorium.

**********

The next Celibacy club saw Rachel, Puck, Santana, Brittany, Artie, Lauren  and I all in the classroom together. Rachel began, banging the gavel and sitting where Miss Pillsbury normally sat.

"I hereby call the Celibacy Club to order" She said looking at us all.

"Where's Miss Pillsbury?" Puck asked her.

"She decided to take the hour she was spending here to fix her sham of a marriage. In the interim, I'll be taking over" Rachel said proudly.

"Because you annoyingly take over everything?" Santana asked.