PAREHO silang nakaupo sa upuan sa nay garden ng bahay-tahanan. Maaliwalas ang hangin at malilim dahil sa puno. Maaliwalas at payapa ang paligid pero, ang puso ni Ezra ay hindi. Kinakabahan siya habang katabi si Roi.
Meanwhile, Roi couldn't find the right words to say. He was out of words. Ang inaalala niya ay ang pag-iwas sa kaniya ni Ezra. Akala kasi niya maayos na sila. Akala niya p'wede na siyang pansinin ulit ng babae na parang maayos ang lahat sa kanila pero, kanina ay hindi man lang siya nito nagawang tingnan. Parang hindi siya kilala kaya nasabi niya ang mga 'yon.
What now, Roi? Ikaw nag-insist na mag-usap kayo tapos, wala kang sasabihin? Are you nuts?
Napabuntonghininga na lang ang lalaki. When it comes to Ezra, he's really going nuts.
"A-akala ko may sasabihin ka?" tanong ni Ezra habang hindi nakatingin sa kaniya. Roi cleared his throat and felt his sweaty palm.
Nandito na rin naman, wala nang atrasan.
Roi sighed. "It's never my intention to hurt you. I swear, hindi ko kailanman pinlano na saktan ka o paiyakin," panimula niya.
"Then, why?"
Mapait na napangiti si Roi. "Do you remember my stories about my father?"
Natigilan si Ezra at napatingin sa binata. Nakita niya ang mapait na ngiti nito at hindi man niya aminin, alam niya sa sarili niyang nasasaktan pa rin siya para kay Roi.
Of course, she remembered it all. All of his stories about their father.
"Nakukwento ko sa 'yo noon kung ilang beses akong napalayas sa bahay namin. Laging galit sa akin ang tatay ko. Hindi lang sa akin, pati rin sa mga ate ko. Parang hindi niya kami anak kung ituring kami." Tumingin si Ezra sa nakakuyom na kamay ni Roi.
"He would always hurt us, that's why there are times where I chose to not show myself to you. Ayoko na makita mo lahat ng pasa at sugat ko noon dala ng pananakit ng tatay namin..."
"He would always tell me that my dream is boring and lame. Wala daw akong mararating sa pagtatanghal pero, nagpatuloy ako. Hindi ako sumuko kasi 'yon ang gusto ko. Nandoon ka no'ng panahong natanggap ako sa isang audition at nang malaman ng tatay ko 'yon, alam mo kung anong reaksyon niya?" Lumingon sa kaniya si Roi.
"Natuwa siya, Ezra."
Napatitig si Ezra sa binata at unti-unting naramdaman ang pagguhit ng ngiti sa labi niya pero, napawi 'yon nang muling magsalita si Roi.
"Natuwa siya hindi dahil natanggap ang anak niya. Natuwa siya hindi dahil ipinagmamalaki niya ako. Natuwa siya kasi may nakita siyang daan para mas maging kilala siya. Natuwa siya kasi may anak siyang magagamit para ipagmayabang sa mga tao at para mas hangaan siya."
Napasandal si Roi at huminga nang malalim.
"Then, one time... he made me choose," sabi ng binata. "He has connections, he has the power and he used it against me. He found out that I have a girlfriend and it's you." Kumalabog ang dibdib ni Ezra sa kaba habang naghihintay ng sasabihin ni Roi.
She was waiting for this. She was anticipating for the answers on why Roi left her. Ito na 'yon, malalaman na niya at hindi niya alam kung anong kahihinatnan ng pag-amin ni Roi.
"I was young and naive. I was desperate to chase my dream. My father made me choose between you or my dream and I'm a fucking jerk for contemplating at that time. I shouldn't think twice before choosing you but, I did it that time," tila nanghihinang tumingin sa kaniya si Roi.
"I was about to choose you after contemplating but, my father used his power against me. He threatened me that he will call all the agency in the entire country to not let me in. He wants me to stay as his display. Being the coward I am, I was scared. I was scared to lose my dream. Pinangarap ko 'yon mula pa nang bata ako. Pinangarap 'yon para sa akin ni mama kaya hindi ko hahayaang mawala 'yon."
Ezrs didn't know what to react. She believed that Roi really didn't care about her. She went to the point where she thought that Roi just used her. She thought all the possible reason why Roi abandoned her but, she never thought about his father. Akala niya si Roi mismo ang gustong makipaghiwalay pero, mali siya.
"I'm sorry for being a coward, Ezra. I'm sorry for not choosing you. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for choosing my dream over you," Roi gained his courage to scoot closer and hold her hand. "I'm sorry for letting you think that I don't care about you anymore. I'm sorry for inflicting negative thoughts in your mind and making you cry. I'm sorry for believing him when he said that you're just a mere distraction to me."
"Roi..."
"When I already reached my dream, I should be happy. I should be proud because, I reached my childhood dream but, no..." Roi's hand started shaking. Hindi na rin mapigil ni Ezra ang pagluha. Napahawak na rin siya sa kamay ni Roi na nakahawak sa kamay niya.
"I'm sorry, Ezra. Alam kong hindi mo ako mapapatawad sa nagawa ko... alam kong n-nasaktan kita nang sob—"
"Roi..." Ezra's hands went to Roi's cheeks. "Listen to me..." mahinang sabi ni Ezra bago huminga nang malalim.
"Yes, you hurt me. You inflicted pain in me. You made me question my worth... you made me question my love..." Tumango naman si Roi na parang tinatanggap ang lahat ng sinasabi ni Ezra.
"Sa nagdaang mga taon, patuloy kong hinahanap ang rason. Habang nakikita kitang masaya at matagumpay sa pangarap mo, naisip ko na... hindi mo na ako kailangan. Umabot pa sa puntong naisip ko na baka... baka ginamit mo lang ako pa—"
"No! Of course not, Ezra!" tila natatarantang sabi ni Roi at hinawakan ang kamay ni Ezra na nasa pisngi niya. Umiiling iling siya na parang natatakot sa naisip ni Ezra.
Tumango si Ezra habang patuloy sa pagluha. "I know, Roi. I know. N-ngayong narinig ko na ang paliwanag mo, naintindihan ko na. You chose your dream over me and I will never be against it. Una mong minahal ang pangarap mo kaysa sa akin kaya hinding-hindi kita pipigilan doon, Roi," mahinang sabi ni Ezra.
Napatitig sa kaniya ang binata at tila hindi makapaniwalang natawa. "You should be mad at me but, why... why are you talking to me like it's all fine? Why are you so kind?"
"Wala kang kasalanan. Naipit ka lang sa sitwasyon, Roi. Wala tayong kasalanan," bulong ni Ezra.
The both of them embraced each other. Parehong walang pakialam sa paligid at ang tanging gusto lang ay ang mayakap ang isa't isa matapos ang ilang taong pangungulila.
"I'm really sorry, Ezra," Roi Niccolo whispered. Niyakap niya si Ezra at agad namang sumandal sa kanya ang dalaga.
"Hindi mo kasalanan, Roi. It's fine, hush now. Narinig ko na ang paliwanag mo, hindi na ako galit," Ezra softly said, feeling the peacefulness in her heart.
Roi pulled away and stared at her eyes. "Will you allow me now to get this close to you? I badly wants to hug you like this but, I'm scared because, I know that you're mad at me. N-ngayon... p'wede na ba?"
Sinubukang pakiramdaman ni Ezra ang sarili niya kung may galit o sakit pa ba sa puso niya. She went silent for a minute before she took a deep breath. Nginitian niya si Roi at hindi nagsalita. Kusa nang kumilos ang katawan niya para yakapin nang mahigpit si Roi.
"P'wedeng-p'wede, Roi."
YOU ARE READING
Boundless
Romance[SOON TO BE PUBLISHED] Everyone deserves a second chance however, are you willing to give one to the person who already wounded you? To the one who abandoned you? Roi Niccolo Kingston had aspirations of being a singer, and Ezra Marie Crisanto did no...
