9-1-1 and 9-1-1 Lone Star one shots (mostly angst)

18: TK+Carlos⚠️⚠️

•Title: "Bad call"

•Requester:

•Warnings: talk of drugs and addiction.

•Inspiration: I don't know, just randomly thought of it when I woke up today.

•Type: angst

A/N: Okay, so the only addictions I have dealt with is nicotine and self harm, so I will be talking about my experience with my self harm addiction. For me, it's rarely the big things that lead to a relapse, like someone dying or something. It's the smaller things that lead to a relapse. I swear, one time I relapsed because I couldn't find my glasses. Please, if you are getting sober/ clean from any addiction, know that you're not alone. You can do this. You're strong. Oh,

_____ _____ _____

Tk's adrenaline is pumping as Judd carries a teenager towards the ambulance. The second the body is placed on the ground, Tommy, TK, and Nancy make quick work in accessing him. Paul comes out next with an older man in his arms. He informs them that there's no pulse. TK is sent to work on this man and he immediately begins to perform CPR. He sighs in relief as he gets a pulse back, the man's eyes opening.

This doesn't last for long, though, as the man's eyes are rolling back and he is losing his pulse soon after. TK tries for fifteen or so minutes to get his pulse back before Tommy and Nancy are pulling him away. The 126 firefighters watch in horror. TK's first loss.

+ + + + +

After a silent ride, the two rigs end up back at the fire house. TK is pulled up to the lounge by Nancy and Marjan, the others following. Tommy pulls Owen into her office with a saddened expression.

"Owen, I am his captain and ultimately, the decision is mine, but you're his father and I wanted your opinion first," Tommy begins, "I think that we should send TK home, or at least take him off shift."

Owen sighs, "I think you're right. This loss will most likely hit him harder."

"That's what I was thinking," Tommy says gently.

The two captains step outside of the office and call for TK. The brunette stands up and walks slowly towards the two.

"TK, after discussing it, your father and I have decided to end your shift now," Tommy says softly. TK doesn't put up much of a fight at this suggestion. He pretty much just nods and stands up.

"TK, Carlos' shift doesn't end for another two hours. Why don't you just hang around here until then?" Owen suggests.

"No, I'm just going to go home and go to bed. Thank you though," he moves to leave the room before turning around, "don't tell Carlos, though. I don't want him worrying."

Owen nods and TK walks to the locker room, grabbing his things and leaving. He doesn't say anything to the team, but they understand.

+ + + + +

TK is sitting on the floor of his and Carlos' shared bedroom, leaning against the wall. His eyes are fixed on the safe that is under the bed. Carlos doesn't know that TK is aware of the safe's combination, as it's the safe that holds any heavy duty medication that TK can't have. Normally, Carlos doesn't have any in the home, but given his latest... experience, he was given some for the pain of his concussion that he had had. TK doesn't even know if there are any left, but in his mind, he has to at least try.

His phone is in his hand, and his eyes move to focus on the screen. He looks at his list of favorites, A.K.A his relapse list. This is his list of people to call when he feels like he might relapse.

Cooper. Can't call him, he isn't even in Texas, and a phone call won't be enough.

Judd. On shift.

Marjan. On shift.

Mateo. On shift.

Paul. On shift.

Nancy. On shift.

Tommy. On shift.

Dad. On shift.

Carlos. He's never seen this side. The addict about to relapse side.

TK takes in a sharp breath. His mind is torn, fighting a war. Part of his mind is telling, begging, him to take drugs. The other part is pleading for him not to. It's almost as if he can hear the fight, the screaming between these two parts of the brain. He places his phone on the ground as he moves his hands to his hair. He clutches the brunette locks in his fists, pulling as he lets out a cry of anguish.

As his cry dies out in the air, he releases his hair. He lets out a desperate sigh and turns to his phone. The screen is still on his favorites list, so he reaches out his index finger and clicks on the contact. As the screen changes, he clicks the phone icon. He lifts the phone to his ear as he hears it begin to ring.

"TK? You okay?" Carlos' voice comes through the phone.

"C-carlos," TK says as his voice breaks.

"Hey, baby, what's going on?"

"I'm sorry," TK takes a deep breath as tears fall down his face, "I know you're at work, but I need you."

+ + + + +

By the time Carlos pulls into a parking space, his heart is running against his rib cage as his mind spirals. He knows TK is an addict, but he never saw it as a fault. He had already begun to fall for the firefighter/paramedic before learning about his past. It's always a thought that gnaws at the back of his mind any time something bad happens that TK could relapse. He trusts TK completely, he just worries. How could he not worry about his husband?

Owen, despite TK's wishes, had texted Carlos. Nothing specific, just letting him know that TK was sent home after a rough shift. Owen didn't voice it, but Carlos knows, he was worried TK would relapse. Carlos is rushing towards the loft. It's not just that TK said he needed him. It's the way TK's voice was breaking. Carlos could tell there was pain behind his words.

Carlos opens the door and walks into the loft. He walks over towards the bedroom cautiously. His heart hadn't calmed down even slightly. He pushes the bedroom door open and looks towards the safe. His heart grows even faster when he sees the door open. He had recently changed the combination, worried TK had figured it out, so now he sees that there is a crowbar on the floor. Carlos' eyes move to his husband's shaking figure. He carefully sits on the floor next to him.

"Hey, TK," he says softly, "I'm home."

"C-Carlos," TK's voice is shaking as he clutches a pill bottle in his hands, "I-I d-didn't take them."

Carlos takes the pills from TK's hand. He pulls his husband down so that his head is on his lap, "I'm proud of you, TK. You've done so well, you're so incredibly strong. I'm here now, though, you can let go. Just feel your emotions. I'm here to keep you safe."

With that, as if Carlos had flipped a switch in his mind, TK lets out a loud sob. The sound of it breaks Carlos' heart. He has never heard TK cry like this, not even when his mother died. Then again, TK was never one for showing all of his emotions. Carlos grabs TK's hand and holds it tightly as he uses his other hand to run through TK's hair. They stay in this position until TK cries himself to sleep, exhausted from the day. Carlos slips his phone from his pocket and lets Owen know that TK is safe.

He meant what he said on his wedding day.

For better, for worse. In sickness and in health.

He does.

_____ _____ _____

A/N: I hope you enjoyed! Send in requests if you have any!