rag doll | TWD

[30] cryin'

cryin' --- aerosmith

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[POV]

JJ being alone, with Judith, had made hours feel like days, centuries. She didn't know what to do half of the time. Watching Judith was Beth's job.

Judith began to cry. 

"Oh, no. No, no." She lightly bounced her, "it's okay. I know you're hungry. I wish- I wish I had something to give you." She continued to cry. "I know, I know. Shh, shh, shh. We're gonna find our people...I hope."

"There was a time, when I was so broken-hearted. Love wasn't much of a friend of mine." JJ lightly sang Cryin' by Aerosmith to the wailing child. "The tables have turned. Cause me and them ways have parted. That kind of love was the killin' kind." 

Judith began to quiet down at her aunt's singing of the classic rock song. "You like that? That was Aerosmith. You get that from me." JJ smiled down at the calming baby. "Your Aunt JJ was in a band. Your Aunt Maggie was in it too. We sang a lot of Aerosmith...and Bon Jovi. That was your mom's favorite band. She would only let me play Bon Jovi when I first started playing." 

JJ started walking again but continuing to talk to her only friend out in the woods. "Your mom would've been disappointed. I should've paid more attention to you, and how Beth took care of you. That should've been me taking care of you. Instead, I was too focused on my schoolgirl crush."

"And you know, like, the thing that sucks, is he asked me to talk." Judith looked up to JJ, giving her the baby stare. "I know right? Like what did he want to talk about? I keep telling myself that it was something stupid, like I'd left the keys in the guard tower again or something. But he like- never would've asked 'can we talk'. He would've just said it." JJ groaned, "This is so embarrassing for me."

Judith giggled, causing JJ to do the same. "Look at that- making fun of other people's stupid crushes. You already got your aunt's humor." JJ's smile faded when two walkers began coming towards her. Without her gun, she was left to defend Judith with only a knife. 

She figured out how she would do this. With a baby in one hand and the knife in the other, she stabbed one walker, while kicking the other one to the ground, stomping her boot through its head. 

JJ breathed heavily, "Okay, this isn't gonna be easy. We gotta figure out something else, baby girl."

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JJ kept walking. Not knowing where she was going or what direction she was headed. She wanted to know who else was alive- if they were alive. It drove her crazy. Not knowing and being alone in the middle of the woods with a baby. 

"You know, the worst part about this isn't that the only person I have to talk to is a baby. It's that you can't tell me when I say stupid things." JJ looked down to Judith, who looked right back up with bright eyes. "Yeah, you give me that look after everything I say. So, either you don't have any idea what I'm talking about, or you think everything I say is crazy..." JJ whispered, "I'm hoping it's the first part."

Up ahead, JJ spotted a small, one-story, brick house covered in vines. The lawn had grown up, but within the tall grass, there was kid's toys- a rusted swing set, some G.I. Joe action figures strown about, even some Barbies mixed within. 

JJ stayed alert, quietly walking up to the door. She didn't have anyone to help her clear it or to stand watch. She had to do this on her own. JJ knocked on the window like Daryl had done at the Big Spot and waited for a walker. There wasn't one. 

The house was completely abandoned. No walkers...no humans. It was empty to JJ's surprise and relief. 

The first thing she plumaged through was the cabinets in the kitchen. She prayed that there would be some sort of baby food, or at least something for Judith. Neither of the two had eaten much. Finding food for a baby during the apocalypse was much more difficult than one would think.

"Oh, Thank God." JJ took the few jars of baby food out of the pantry. "Look at this. Yum. You've got some great options here, Little J." She looked at it, grimacing, "Corn, sweet potatoes and pumpkin and... oh, mmm, mushed peas." JJ looked back to Judith, "Well, I know which one you don't want."

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The place with the jars of baby food had walkers gathering outside of it. Luckily, just right down the road, JJ had spotted another vacant property. It was well-kept given the circumstances. Sure, it was dusty, and the place was covered in cobwebs, but for the most part, JJ could see calling it a temporary home for her and Judith. 

"You know, Maggie and I used to talk about our dream houses all the time. She would've loved this place. Cozy home, in the woods...away from everybody. The garden would've been the main catch, though. Hershel...man, Mr. G would've gone mad about that garden." 

JJ chuckled just thinking about her late-night talks with her college roommate. "I was the opposite. My dream included a big, white mansion at the top of a hill. I'd buy it myself after hittin' it big with a record label." She shook her head at the idea, "Yeah, I was quite the dreamer. I would have a volleyball court in the backyard for July 4th tournaments, and a big pool. The fancy, inground ones with the waterfalls like at Rick's first house. Of course, there'd be a recording studio. And a guest room for Maggie, and Rick, and Lori," JJ sighed, "and Carl."

"I'd be the fun, cool aunt who had everything that you could ever dream up. And I would spoil the shit out of you, and Carl and whatever kids Maggie ended up havin'. Both of the Greene's were obsessed with the ideas of big families." Judith laughed cause JJ to smile. "I had the same reaction."

JJ studied Judith, "I never really wanted kids. They always seemed like too much work. But being the aunt, now that was the best of both worlds. I could spoil you all you wanted, but when I was sick of you, I'd just hand you right back to my brother."

She let out a loud sigh, "but... there's no one to hand you back to."

JJ started to aimlessly walk around the house like one does when they're talking on the phone. "That's not to say, though, that Rick is dead. Or Carl, Maggie, Glenn, Michonne, Beth...Daryl. He called you Little Ass-Kicker when we couldn't figure out a name for you. I'm gonna have to tell you about everyone. Anybody who ever cared for you...which is a lot."

After doing all the talking, JJ looked at a babbling Judith, "I'm gonna go crazy. When do babies even start talking?" She went to the bookshelf in the corner. There was a variety. "I never was much of a reader." JJ sifted through the books, "Ah, here we go. Parenting For Dummies. Probably need to take notes on this one."

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JJ had taken the time to establish a makeshift walker fence with some cans and other metal objects lying around the house. Knowing she'd made this place as safe as she could, she was finally about to get some sleep on the couch as Judith laid in the bassinet. 

Just seconds after she closed her eyes, the cans outside started to rattle. But it wasn't walkers. There were muffled voices. JJ unsheathed her knife and stood by the door, afraid she'd be seen if she tried to look out the window. It didn't matter when Judith began to cry. 

"Is somebody in there?!" One of the voices from outside shouted. 

JJ breathed deeply, "We don't want any trouble. I just needed a safe place for my baby." She did her best to sound innocent. 

There was a pause. Silence. 

Maybe they left. Thought JJ. 

"JJ?!" The voice from outside called. 

JJ stood up, her heart racing as she opened the door. 

"Oh- oh, my God." She breathed. "Carol."

a/n: short lil' chapter tonight for y'all! <3