Everything Has Changed (Harry Styles)

Chapter 20

Lexi's POV

"Niall, please no. Just stop. Don't start with this." I shook my head and looked out the window. The clouds casted a dark shadow over the city.

"Lexi, he loves you. You need to talk to him. I don't mean like an occasional hi. I mean actually talk to him," Niall insisted. He was right, but I didn't want to. I just couldn't talk to him. 

"And say what exactly? It always ends up with him kissing me and walking away. He keeps showing me stuff I don't remember and it get complicated!" I rubbed my hands over my eyes. "I can't keep doing this Niall. I have a boyfriend." I whispered the last part softly, trying not to raise my voice.

"Is he really your boyfriend? How many times has he called you or talked to you since we were here in the States? Does he get you like Harry used to? Or at least how I do? Lexi, you can't just put off what happened between you and Harry. I've never seen him so happy in his life. Not even when we got signed by Simon. Not when they announced us playing at MSG...." Niall's voice trailed off frustratedly. I finally faced him, staring at him in the eyes.

"I can put it off if I don't even remember what happened, Niall. So what if Seth only calls once a day. He knows I'm busy and so is he. We wake up and go to bed at different times. It's HARD. And I'm sorry Harry isn't how he was. I don't even remember how he was. I don't remember a damn thing!" My arms flung up in the air. I'm sure the driver was now uncomfortable by us screaming. 

"He loves you, Lexi. Why can't you see that?" Niall sighed, looking at his hands.

"I love him too. Just not the same way he loves me. I love him as a brother and just a brother. Nothing else." 

"I don't see that. The way you look at him tells me the truth. Actions speak louder than words, Lexi. I see you glare at Taylor when she's around. I see how you tense up when she puts her arm around him. And even when Harry hugs her. You look as though you're ready to pounce. I see the truth. Deep down, you still love him. I just don't get why you can't admit it." 

Why does Niall have to be right? It just wouldn't be fair for Seth though. I love the both of them, but just can't choose. I decided to say something I'm sure I'll regret later on.

"What if the accident was a sign? What if it was there to keep Harry and I from being together?" I mumbled it, that way only Niall could hear it.

"Don't say that, Lexi. That's not true. Don't you ever say that. You and Harry were in love. The way he treats you...is something different than I've ever seen. You can't say that. Not ever." 

I couldn't help but disagree. Out of every girl in the world, somehow it was me. Why my best friend? Why? 

The rest of the ride was silent. I walked to my hotel room, getting ready for bed. I took a shower, washed my face, added ointment to the tattoos. My hair dried and I put it up in a bun. I wore one of the hoodies Seth had given me. It still smelled like him too.  

I sat in bed, checking twitter and a bit of tumblr. I tweeted something, something the fans may scream over, but something only I would understand. Maybe the boys would understand, but I'm not so sure.

HaiItsLexi: Nothing's fine. I'm torn. 

I'm torn between two people. To boys I've known practically all my life. It hurts. My mind was spinning with questions, fishing for answers. 

My phone had rung. Picking it up, the caller ID had said it was Seth. But why would Seth be up this late? 

"Babe, what's wrong?" I said into the phone. I laid back onto my pillows and waited for an answer.