Chapter 37

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San left the dorm room with his backpack. Left Wooyoung hurt and perhaps crying.

His head was spinning with dizziness, confusion, anger and loads of questions. And the very first question that was occupying a major space was...

'Why did San save Wooyoung?'

He descended down the stairs with heavy and large footsteps. Walking towards the main building, he saw the same man, now awake and drinking a cup of coffee. He scoffed bitterly on his own.

It was still early to the college. A very few numbers of students roaming around.

San needed a quiet place to clear his mind. Perhaps a restroom could help him. So that's where he was heading towards.

Swiftly opening the white door, he closed it with a soft thud. He kept his backpack on the floor, just beside his leg. Turning the tap open, he collected a fair amount of water on his palm and splashed it on his face with whatever energy was left in him.

As soon as the cold water touched his face, it send shivers down his spine. He released a breath of relief. Relief from pain of uncontrolled rage. He somehow felt free of those things for a brief moment. For this moment.

He held the basin ends tightly, he started to shake again. His breaths again slowly started to become heavy and shaky.

He again collected a handful amout of cold water to splash. But before he could, San spoke up.

"San..." San stopped his actions. A sigh of annoyance was heard from him.

He gave no response. San practically slapped his palms full of cold water, on his face, making a splashing sound and the water overflowing. He then traced his wet hands along his hair, making it damp and change it's form along how he dragged his fingers through them.

"What the heck do you want now?!" San practically yelled. He saw his second personality appear in the mirror, changing his reflection. It was funny to him how messed up his mind was.

San just nodded, hands on his hips. "It's completely okay to be angry, you know?"

San scoffed bitterly at him. "Okay?! You think it's okay?!"

San just nodded again, gulping slightly. "You needed to calm down!"

"How can I?!" San again yelled. He started to move back and forth in the restroom. "Do you know how hard it's for me to accept that my own roomate is the one who hurted my best friend?!"

San pressed his lips into a fine line. Although San never really had any friends, he tried to understand what it was like to have one. He understood the other's agony at that moment. But San was just being paranoid right now.

"Just... Just tell me why did you defend him?! Didn't you hate him?" San's voice broke from how much pressure he was applying on his voice box.

San was silent for a brief moment.

"Huh! Knew you're out of words!" San scoffed bitterly, mocking the other's silence.

San pressed his lips into a fine line and shook his head.
"It's not like that."

"Then what the FUCK is it?!!" San slammed his hands harshly on the basin edges.
San didn't flinch.

"Hey!! Calm down!!" San yelled this time.

"It's true that I hate him! But it doesn't mean I fucking beat him like nothing!"

"I hated him because he hurted you! I hated him because he was a bully!!"

"I wanted you to become like me, bold, courageous and learn combats, not to use on him! But to use for yourself defence!!!" San yelled at the top of his voice making San flinch hard and stumbled back a little.

"I didn't teach you those things to become somebody like him! Who'll later hurt someone else...

I didn't teach you all those things to become somebody like...." San paused for a moment.

"Me...."

There was silence. They both were standing with their heads hung low.

"San... I want you to listen to me...."

"And how exactly many times do I have to?!"

They were back to again quarrelling.

"What?"

"I asked- HOW MANY MORE TIMES DO I HAVE TO?!" San yelled at the other, as he threw his hands on the sink table, making a 'bang' sound.

"You always tend to control my life!" San's eyes were watery. He was very frustrated.

"San...it's not like this....I just-"

"Want to help me?! I know what you want to say! Don't act like I'm stupid!" San accused the other.

He stared at his reflection with angry, rageful watery eyes. His eyes were darker than ever.

"San-" San again tried to continue, but only to be cut by the other again.

"It's always either you! Or Wooyoung! Who wants to manipulate my life!!" he continued to yell at the other.

San could feel the agony and rage inside the other, afterall he was his second personality.

"San! I don't want to manipulate you! I will NEVER!!" San finally spoke up.

"You know right that I haven't heard these words for the first time?" San simply said with a comparatively low temper. "You always say this, but do exactly the OPPOSITE!!!" San yelled at the end of the sentence and pointed his index finger towards his reflection. He gritted his teeth hard.

It was very hard for him to accept how much broken he was. It was like stinging him every moment he makes eye contact with his second personality. It hurted him as he was unwillingly reminded how he hurted other people when San would be in control. It was as if he was always being blinded by the other's useless hopeful words.

San sighed. "San, I-"

"Please... Please I do not want to hear another word..." San's voice broke as he tears now ran freely down his cheeks.

"I'm so so... Sorry for everything... I really do not mean to hurt you in anyway...."

"Please, stop. You do not mean those words. So keep your mouth shut..." he continued to sob.

"San I really do mean it!-"

"No! You DON'T!"

"San just-"

As San was about to say something else, suddenly the door of the restroom opened. They became alter as the door went wide open for someone to enter.

And to San's horror he was the one and only person he never wanted to see at this moment...

There...

On the gateway, stood Yunho, with his backpack, eye brows crooked in suspicion. San visibly gulped hard, so did his second personality.

Yunho stared at the other for a brief moment before he stated something, San never wanted to hear, truly...-

"With whom were you talking to?!"

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Extremely sorry for such a short chapter ༎ຶ⁠‿⁠༎ຶ

Anyone excited about San's past? I mean about the host's...

Comment your ideas or thoughts about it!!

See you all soon!!! 💓

𝕁𝕌𝕊𝕋 ℝ𝕆𝕆𝕄𝔸𝕋𝔼𝕊?Where stories live. Discover now