It All Started In Detention

Fifty Two

Disclaimer: this chapter contains explicit sexual content, mentions of eating disorders and self hatred. Please proceed with caution, there is stuff after the smut, after the ~~~ so skip there if you aren't comfortable with smut.
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~Oikawa~

Oikawa doesn't want to be here.

And not in that normal way of being annoyed by this man and not wanting to admit how much he actually wants to fuck. Although that is present, mixed with the dread of the project, today he really doesn't want to be here.

He knows what Iwaizumi is going to ask him. Knows the look he's going to get when he answers. And of all fucking days, today is not a day he wants to deal with it. He can't take it today. He just can't. Tomorrow, probably. Yesterday, obviously, he legit admitted to his fucking issue. But today...

He feels like shit. That's the only word to describe this awful feeling crawling under his skin and making his heart clench. Shit.

He doesn't even get the chance to muster up the courage and knock on the door because it's suddenly opening on its own, surprising Oikawa from his brain as his eyes meet a slightly annoyed Iwaizumi. Although he also looks kind of amused. It's honestly hard to tell with the man.

"You just gonna stand out here all day?" He asks and yeah Oikawa had no idea whether this was annoying the man or amusing him. Oikawa manages a weak smirk though.

"Is that an option?" That gets the annoyance Oikawa was kind of looking for but the Iwaizumi just steps to the side for Oikawa to enter.

"No." Oikawa frowns but does walk through the door, even if everything in his body is telling him to turn around and go home.

He just needs to get this over with. Maybe if he makes it clear enough he's not in the mood for the food shit, Iwaizumi won't—

"Did you eat yet today?" The question comes with the sound of the front door closing, Oikawa freezing in between the kitchen and the stairs that lead up to the boy's room. The question makes his skin crawl. Makes him tense in annoyance. Makes him want to dig his nails into his palms just to release some of this awful tension he feels in his body.

"No." He answers shortly and then heads upstairs to the boy's room. He knows he won't be able to avoid this. But he'd rather deal with his shit, not near the man who is passed out on the living room couch. Iwaizumi is close behind him, closing the bedroom door as Oikawa drops his bag at the end of the bed.

"What about yesterday?" He doesn't really know why it makes him snap. The question. But it does.

"No! Okay!? " He spins around to face Iwaizumi who has his arms crossed over his chest. "No I didn't fucking eat today and no I didn't fucking eat yesterday!" Iwaizumi doesn't flinch at the sudden volume change. "But I really dont wanna hear you're whole 'I have an eating disorder' spiel. Okay!?" Iwaizumi just stares at him, unbothered. "I can't take it today and I get it. I fucking get it. I'm fucked up and slowly killing myself!" Iwaizumi takes a step forward. "I know that and I get it already but I really really can't listen to that shit today!" He takes another step closer.

"Just today! Can I have just one goddamn day where you're not reminding me that my head is fucked!" Another step. "That I'm destroying my life." Another. "I get it!" Another. "I already feel so fucking shitty today; I hate how I look, I hate how I feel, I fucking hate myself and I dont need you reminding me that I'm broken!" Another. "I feel so shitty in my own fucking skin so please just shut the fuck up about it!" Another. "I feel like I'm fucking drowning, going back and forth on how I hate food and how I'm destroying my life, and honestly maybe I fucking deserve this but I dont want to hear any of that from you today!" Another"I can't handle it today." One more. "I just can't today okay so will you just—" His words are cut off by the other boy's lips, stunning Oikawa to silence. He didn't even realize the boy was coming closer to him. But here he was, right in front of him, fingers gently holding his chin as he breaks their kiss before Oikawa's brain could fully process it. He blinks at Iwaizumi, who is looking into his eyes, standing so their toe to toe.