Memoirs of a Bottom Bitch | completed

7.

It was thanksgiving, Pashianne had cooked a full course meal, and the site of her growing belly made me sick to my stomach. Bliss never admitted he was father, but he knew I had knowledge of the truth. She was carrying his child child. I had stepped away from our "family" dinner and went into the bathroom, I decided to call my mother for the first time since I had left, It had been about four months since I had I ran away and almost seven months since Bliss and I had been together.

"Hello?" She giggled. I could hear the sounds of a full house and thinking about her candy yams made my mother water.

"Ma, it's me." I said. The next few moments there was silence.

"Tajai, you calling after four months, what you need some money or something because you already know I don't got it." Her tone was harsh, cold even. It brought tears to my eyes because I felt my phone call was unwelcomed.

"No," I paused. "I'm doing fine, I eat everyday, and I'm working and stuff. I just wanted to call, just to let you know I was alive. Bye momma," I said about to release the call.

"Tajai come home, wherever you are come home. We been looking for you for months, I didn't know if you dead or alive. I won't be mad if you just come home," she said switching her tone.

"I can't," I paused. "I love you, bye." I said hanging up and I sat on the toilet with my hands over my face, and I just started crying my eyes out. I was tired of being an adult, I wanted my freedom and my childhood back but I knew Bliss wouldn't let me leave.

"What are you doing?" Bliss said opening the bathroom door.

"Nothing, was just wishing my mother a happy holiday." I said walking pass him. He grabbed my arm and stared me in my eyes.

"You didn't tell her where you were did you?" He asked me.

"Why would it matter where I was?" I questioned him.

"Because, I don't need no police knocking on my door looking for you." He said. "I told you what would happened if you tried to leave, Doll." He said assuring me that if I left he would try and hurt me.

"I know, Bliss. I'm not trying to leave, I'm just home sick. All my friends are going to homecoming and enjoying things KIDS my age do." I said whole heartedly.

"Do you think after everything you been doing here in chicago, you can just go back to Ohio and go back to being 16?" he asked me. "You already got a taste of a different lifestyle. Ohio is boring and ain't nothing there for you, you been making money and doing whatever you want to the past few months. You want to go back to being poor?"

"I wasn't poor!" I scolded him.

"Well when I picked you up you was still rocking baby doll curls and chuck taylors, anybody would kill to be in your place." he paused. "You know I chose you because I see your potential to live on side of me and make money with me, I love you more then any of these hoes,"

"So why is one of your hoes having your baby?" I asked. "That shit is so disrespectful, and she running 'round spreading her legs for money and you still have the nerve to wanna touch on me. Who knows who and what ran up in that." I rolled my eyes.

"Pashianne been here long before you, I love all you but I love you the most, it's different with them." He said. "They came to me already tainted. I put you on a petalstool and molded you into exactly how I wanted you to be." He paused. "I let you get away with so much more because you and I are equal. In a couple years you will be untouchable."

"What do you mean let me?" I asked him.

"You have freedom, and your welcome to come and go as you please. Not to mention that little stash you been building up behind my back," He said. "I know your every move because you make every move I would make if I was your position." He chuckled.