The Bucket List >> Sabriel ✔️

33: Fly To France To Place A Crisp On The Floor

I'm so sorry guys I'm a horrible mother

A remote-control tarantula was spinning around on the floor. Gabe was keeping his thumb on the 'turn left' button, sniggering as the tarantula spun so quickly that it was just a blurred circle on the ground.

"Why are you so amused by this?" Sam questioned in wonder.

"I don't really know to be fair, Samsquatch." Gabe confessed, directing the spider towards Kevin, who was coming out of the Banter Room. He screamed and whirled around back into the room, slamming the door shut.

A loud commotion was coming from down the corridor, and the couple both turned their heads simultaneously. Michael and Lucifer were skipping down the hall, back from their honeymoon, with flower crowns and Hawaiian grass skirts, donned in tie-die shirts and feet clad in bright pink sandals.

Well, Lucifer was skipping, Michael was being dragged along by the beaming, cheery man, an 'I'm so done with this' look on his face.

"Howdy, fuckers!" Lucifer whooped.

"Luci, we were in Hawaii."

"True. Howzit, shitfaces!" Lucifer corrected himself.

Sam stared at Michael's sunburnt skin, and then at Lucifer's perfect, slightly tanned skin.

"Um... How?" Gabe voiced Sam's thoughts, gesturing at their skin.

Michael sighed, rolling his eyes. "Lucifer obviously didn't want to wear suncream. So I had to kindly persuade him to sit down and wear it."

"By tricking me, he means!" Lucifer protested, as Emma and Dean came out of the Banter Room to listen, grinning. "I didn't want to wear it because I was down with accepting the pain, and so what if I get skin cancer, I've already got cancer and I'm already gonna die anyway -"

"No, you are not dying." Michael scowled at him. "Stop making morbid jokes about yourself, it hurts my heart."

"- But Mikey had to be overprotective as usual and trick me! And he used up all the suncream on me just so that I didn't get sunburnt!"

"Aww..." The others all cooed in unison.

"I suppose... It is kinda cute... And kinda hot..." Lucifer mumbled, eyeing Michael up.

"How did he trick you though?" Charlie questioned as she walked past from the bathrooms.

Lucifer glared at Michael. "He wouldn't stop sucking on my neck, and he knows that I can't do literally anything when he's doing that. Like, before I knew it, he had smothered the rest of the bottle on me."

"Necks are many people's weakness." Gabe said matter-of-factly, turning his gaze slowly on Sam. Sam felt his cheeks turn pink.

"We need to go." Gabe said.

"Right now." Sam agreed.

"Immediately." Gabe grabbed Sam's wrist and dragged him swiftly to their hospital room, only to find Balthazar dancing around with a mop, earphones in and humming.

He spotted them and took one earphone out. "Clean-up time! Wanna joi-"

But Gabe and Sam were already back out the door. Balthazar looked, confused, at the door for a second then replaced the earphone and continued humming along to Lady Gaga.