Lost

Chapter 22/ Jordan & Olivia

Jordan's POV

I could feel someone digging around my abdomen. I screamed loudly. I felt someone's grip on my hand. Oh god please make it stop! Once it was over I was whimpering.

Someone lifted me up and I cried out in pain.

"You'll be okay Jordan, so will Olivia." I heard Rick say.

Olivia? What's wrong with her? Oh please tell me she's okay! I started to whimper because my abdomen was burning.

"Hang on just a little longer Jordan." I heard Carl say.

I groaned in pain as Rick set me down. I whimpered when someone put pressure on my stomach.

"This will make it better, I promise you'll be okay." Carl's voice sounded broken.

Oh god, Carl I'm so sorry I'm putting you though this pain!

"He doesn't love you." The voice hissed.

'Shut up and leave me alone!" I replied.

"I can't leave you alone, I am you." The voice said.

'What do you mean, you are me?' I question.

"I am your self conscience. Well the bad side anyway. The sane side." The voice cooed.

'N-no! You aren't sane! You're a monster!' I screamed.

'A-a monster..." I whimpered.

I was brought back to reality when I felt something wet and warm fall on my face. It dripped onto my mouth and I knew it was tears.

"I'm so sorry Jordan..." Carl whispered as he held onto my hand tightly.

"I broke my promise... I can't keep you safe, no matter how hard I try. I-it kills me to say this but, I think we should take a break." Carl said as he kissed my forehead.

"I love you so much..." He sobbed quietly as he let go of my hand and left.

I felt empty and cold. Why you may ask? Because I had fallen in love with Carl Grimes.

Olivia's POV

Silence. Silence and darkness. "Hello?" I called. My words bounced off the walls of silence. I sat down on the ground and closed my eyes.

The darkness didn't bother me, I greeted it like an old friend. Silence on the other hand, silence is like a cancer, it grows.

Then a bright white light flashed. I shielded my eyes and when the light died down, I opened my eyes.

The group stood around me. Their mouths were moving, but no sound came out. Their words meant nothing.

Their words never meant anything...

A tear fell down my cheek. I closed my eyes and let it fall. I opened my eyes and saw a giant clock tower in front of me.

I turn around and see all of the bad times of my life flash before me. The beatings, the heartbreak, and most of all. Jordan's tears. There's just too much that time can not erase.

There's just too much that time can not erase....

Then all of a sudden I was at the prison. I looked around and saw the tank outside of the fence.

My uncle hopped out and began saying soundless words. Then I remembered. It's all in my head.

In your head, they are fighting, with their tanks and their bombs....

I collapsed onto the ground as the screams of Maggie and Beth filled my head.

It's all in your head.

It's all in your head.

A bright light flashed once again and I was in a garden.

You can never leave....

You can never forget....

You can never live....

You will never see them again....

"The hell I won't!" I screamed. Then darkness set in once again.

My eyes flew open and I screamed. Fire raced up and down my body, yet I couldn't move, which meant I couldn't scream.

Lord help us.

Jordan's POV

I could feel someone sitting next to me.

"Hey Jordan, if you are awake and can here me please move a finger." Rick begged.

I tried, I tried so hard to move a finger. Any finger. I couldn't, it took out too much energy. I heard Rick sigh.

"I wanted to talk to you about Carl." Rick said.

I couldn't hear this, it'd hurt too much.

"He's a good son, a good young man. He just doesn't want you to get hurt. He believes if he blocks people out they won't get hurt. I don't believe that but he does." Rick explained.

"He goes on and on about you. All good things, don't worry." He chuckled lightly.

"What I'm trying to say is, just because he ended your relationship, doesn't mean you should give up. Keep fighting, keep being strong Jordan." Rick said as he gently patted my hand.

I wanted to say something, anything, but I just couldn't bring myself to. I internally sighed. Why couldn't I just wake up?! I could feel a small burning in my abdomen. A tear slipped from my eye.

Why do I have to live like this? I didn't want to keep fighting, I didn't wanna keep being strong. I just wanted to let go. But I can't, Olivia would be broken. "She doesn't care! Just let go!" The voice screamed.

So that's what I did. I let go.

Olivia's POV

Just move your god damn hand! Just fucking move! I couldn't move yet I could hear everything.

Footsteps sounded around the church but none were near me. I internally cried and threw myself around.

I heard footsteps by me and I immediately silenced my mind. "Olivia, please wake up." It was Rick.

"Jordan, she's out as well." A pain struck me in the chest. "I need you Olivia, we all need you."

He took a deep breath. "Daryl is always out hunting now that you won't wake up."

He's just making all this up. They are glad you're gone.

"Your leg is patched up, but you lost so much blood, you're white as a ghost."

Just give up already.

He touched my cheek and I internally recoiled at the sudden warmth. "I don't even know if you can hear me."

I can Rick! I try my best to move even just my pinky toe, but I fail.

"You can leave Olivia, if you're in pain just leave." By now he's crying. "I'll take care of Jordan, you leave your pain."

Nah, they'd be extremely happy that you're gone.

He sits closer to me. "You can leave us behind, you don't have to stay." I scream as loud as I can but nothing comes out.

"Please, try and stay strong, but if you can't." He breaks down and begins crying harder.

"T-hen let go." By now he is crying really hard. He leans in and plants a kiss on my frozen lip.

Pity.

When he leans back up, I then feel the lingering ghost feeling of the kiss. I begin to cry. I can't let go, all the things I've done, I'm on the highway to hell and I am driving the bus.

A tear falls down my face, then I notice it.

It was real.