Chapter 12

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Brendon pov

My baby girl is growing up so fast. I don't really like her dating Jayden though. She just met him, I mean he is one of my friends sons but I'm just not sure about him. I just want her to be happy.

As the rest of the night goes on I realize that tour is in a few weeks. I can't wait I haven't told Ash that she is coming with us. She's gonna have to miss a few months of school but I don't think she will mind.

"Hey everyone I'd like to make an announcement!" I yell causing everyone to turn to me.
"So as you all may know Panic! Is going on tour in just a few weeks. The thing you don't know is that I will be taking my daughter with me." Everyone cheers and Ash just looks like she has seen a ghost. She runs up to me and engulfs me into a hug.

"Thank you thank you thank you." She says.

"I'm sorry for everything Ash." I whisper in her ear.

"Brendon come here." She says dragging me into her room.
"Brendon you don't need to be sorry for anything. I understand that people slip up sometimes. Okay, I know that a lot of things are going on but we need to be honest to each other. Let's make a deal okay. Whenever we think about smoking or cutting we come find each other." She says

"Ok it's a deal Ash. Let's start now then, tell me everything and anything about you." I say looking at her intently.

"Ok you start." She says.

"Ok, um I have a journal that I write lyrics in when ever I start feeling depressed or anxious."

"Really can I see?" She says excitedly.

With that I get up from her floor and run into my room. I walk over to the night stand beside my bed and grab a plain black journal. When I get back to Ash's room I see her in the same spot as I had left her but now with drinks and a box of pizza.

"I figured we could eat some stuff while we talk." She says gesturing to the pizza.

"Yeah. Let's get started." I says sitting next to her.

I open the journal to one of the first pages. I started doing this when Ryan first left the band and I havent stopped since. The first lyrics I see are some of the hardest to read, since they remind me so much of those years.

I though we were going so fine.

Where did the good times go?

Your name in my mouth tears me apart.

Was these years nothing to you?

Your tearing me apart.

Don't you know what your doing to me?

I didn't even notice until ash wiped them but there was tears slowly coming from my eyes. God I miss him so much. I wonder if he misses me like I miss him.

"Brendon I never knew that you was this broken. You seem so fine on the outside. I'm so sorry." she says while hugging me.

"I guess that's how it is though.  Some of the happiest seeming people are the most broken take Pete for example. He is so energetic and fun on the outside but he was really broken a few years ago."

"Yeah I know I read his book."

We sit there for a while and just talk about everything from what your is going to be like and our pasts. By the time we finish everyone has left and its 12.

"Hey ash we should go to bed it's getting pretty late and we have a band meeting tomorrow." I say as I get up from her floor.

"Ok but can you stay in here tonight? I just don't want to be alone." She says.

I nod and pick her up and take her to my room. I gently lay her on my bed, and I jump right in beside her. She snuggles her head right into my chest and I pull her close. I'm never going to let her go. 'I love you' I say into her head. Then let sleep take over me.

||Skip to the morning||

I wake up and realise that its 6am, the band meeting is at 10 so I still have time. I decide to take a shower and get ready before I wake Ash up. I take a quick shower then proceed to fix my hair in its normal style. I decided on a black T-shirt, a Fall out boy jacket, black skinny jeans, and a Panic! Snap back.

I trot back into my room and wake ash up. Once she is up she proceeds to the bathroom to get ready. I decided on make Disney waffles and bacon. After about half an hour ash comes skipping down the stairs in an outfit exactly like mine.

"Really Ashayla you had to twin with me?"I ask laughing

"Yeah of course how can we be father and daughter if we don't twin."she says chuckling.

I hand her a plate of princess waffles and bacon. Once we are finished eating we rinse the plates off and head off to the car.

Surprise! Extra chapter this week. Plus all of the lyrics in this is my own, I know they suck but I'm human so.

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