Tracy

005:

               

She turned into the housing tract off Adams and Magnolia that had been her childhood haunt with remembered ease. It was a well-established development, older with taller, leafless trees (This time of year-- it was October). Most of the houses were two-storied, and some had little two tiered fences decorating the established lawns and walkways. Lights were on in most of them, revealing dinner time in progress or after dinner TV watching. It was an older family neighborhood.

Casey's parent's home was one of these, blue with a darker blue trim, a small front lawn with a tree and a fence, the driveway already sported a sedan type car for Coral, and a pick-up with Kirk's construction business logo on the side. She killed her engine out on the street and reached behind her for her small overnight bag and the gift she'd brought them. Then she got out, breathing the silky night air--- smelling of the beach, and the water, and watered grass, and palm trees.

She never knocked. It wouldn't have occurred to her, and they never locked the doors, hadn't once in all the years she'd known them. If Tracy had had real parents, these would have been them. She didn't feel the lack, Kirk and Coral had treated her like their own since she was twelve--- before the band---- at Miles' 7th grade last day of school pool party.

"Mom? Dad?" She opened the door into the warmly lit entry hall, relishing the jackets hanging on the wall hooks as she slipped off the flip-flops the hospital had given her.

"Tracy Lynn? Is that you?" Coral's voice was not melodic but it had the reassuring quality she'd grown up with, and just hearing it after the day she'd had brought a sudden overwhelming choked up eye-spiller on. Coral Crandall didn't even turn the light on in the hall. "We're back here in the den, honey!"

Tracy left her bag at the foot of the stairs, her heart taking in the warm bread and soup smell of the kitchen as she passed it, the light on over the sink, and the dishes going in the dishwasher. Halloween decorations were already up--- a chintzy black cat hanging thing and ceramic ghosts in progressive degrees along the banister that overlooked the den.

Carrying the wrapped gift, she breezed into the den, noting the lack of flying flash of energy that was her baby instantly, and determined not to bring it to everybody's attention---- Mork and Mindy was on the TV---- with that new actor everyone liked, Robin Williams.

"He-ey!" She kissed them each on the cheek, from the sides of their easy chairs, Coral's with a matching ottoman, she'd needlepointed the top with fall colors, and his recliner with manual side bar for elevating the feet. Kirk put it up straight and leaned up for her kisses and hugs.

"How's our girl this week?" He made an effort to give her his full attention, but Mork was doing something funny, and that actually won.

Tracy deliberately stood in front of the TV, right in the way. "Isn't this a re-run?" As he craned his neck to see around her. She dumped the heavier package in his lap. "Brought you something."

"Oh, honey, you didn't have to do that! Isn't that sweet of her, Kirk? She's always so thoughtful!" Coral was gushing, she was just one of those gushing oblivious moms, and Tracy liked her that way, liked her immensely. Coral knew everything about raising kids---- knew everything good about her own kids, and nothing bad. It was naïve, it was ignorant----

It was simple and unsophisticated, and in Tracy's world this represented reality.

Their son's fame and fortune had not affected Kirk and Coral Crandall. They were as sincere as the day they'd met, and always would be.

She plopped onto the frayed woven knit couch, its oranges and browns a comfort. She could feel the cares of the day slipping away. "Aren't you going to open it? Gees! I've been waiting for you to open it all day!" Kirk's hands absently started peeling back the polka dotted paper.

"Wh-where's Casey? Jolie came and got Danny an hour ago. We thought it was your weekend, but Jolie said Casey wanted him." Coral knew there was something amiss, but she was too polite to pry. Her policy had always been to allow her children to make their own choices. She didn't interfere. But she talked about it all incessantly with her sisters and friends.

Tracy counted to ten before answering, her eyes wandering the framed photos on the wall above the TV of Casey's older sister's and brother's weddings and high school graduations. They'd been there for most of Tracy's life. Casey only had the one younger sibling--- Miles, who was in her grade at school--- the elementary school just around the corner they'd all attended since Kindergarten---- well, she and Miles and Casey. Bridget had not moved there until sixth grade and Julian in seventh.

Tracy feigned ignorance. "Pretty sure he's got a gig in Newport tonight."

Coral's eyes darted back and forth from the TV to Kirk's not so busy hands. He was awkward, not looking at what he was doing. But it didn't hide the fact that a blush had crept up her cheeks. Tracy knew she'd actually known all along where Casey was and that she, Tracy was supposed to be with him. The edict to retrieve Danny must have come after the two of them had parted ways. Of course, he wouldn't have told his mother why. Just that the nanny was picking the three year old up early.

Hiding her rage at Casey's callous and unkind motives, she pulled her good leg up under her, and settled the ripped seam of the other leg so her bandage didn't show. No sense alarming them with undue concerns. Besides--- Coral only told her friends any gleaned gossip, but the friends told their friends.....

"How are the wedding plans coming?" Coral changed the subject, still watching Kirk's fumbling. She finally got up and took the half wrapped package from him and finished opening it. "Oh my goodness! It's one of those new-fangled record players!"

Tracy jumped up and pulled the CD's from her purse. She dumped them on the ottoman as she rolled the box over. "It's a CD player, Mom! And these are our CD's." She opened the little cases to show Coral the shiny metallic discs a quarter of the size of an LP. Coral tilted it into the light. "Pepper's albums all on CD, and this----." She opened another one. "This is my latest. It isn't even out yet, you're the first to see it. I snagged one from Michael today at the studio! What do you think of the cover?"

Kirk reached for it, turning the mute on his remote and giving the women his full undivided attention. "Looks like a little plate."

He made as if to throw it like a Frisbee and Tracy leaned over to grab it. Kirk held it out of her reach and tickled her sides with his other hand till she fell across him. "Come here, you!"

She squirmed and screamed--- partly in pain as her bruises hit the side of his recliner, but she managed to laugh the way he expected. He loved to tickle the girls. No one else was ever allowed to tickle her. For some reason even the memory of Jerry Nelson's tickles hurt her. She slid off onto the floor as Kirk handed the CD back to his wife.

Coral had the whole box open and was pulling the shiny black and silver player out of its plastic wrap.

Setting up the new CD player occupied the next half an hour, and talk revolved around school and work, people they all knew and what they had for dinner. No mention of Casey or Danny. The unspoken taboo.

*****