♤ ı [3] An Everlasting Love

ı 04 ı Take me to the Grave

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"I'm right on the edge, and I know how to swim, but I'm not jumping in"

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IN THE MIST of all the confusion that has spread into chaos inside my compacted mind do I finally see clearance through one simple solution. The only solid evidence I can think of that will finally put my mind at ease with the fragile reality that is of James coming back from the dead is to travel to the place he died, to the place he was buried.

It's simple really. If his body isn't in his coffin, then I will be forced to believe that he's alive, and if his body is in the coffin then I have prepared myself a backup plan that may or may not involve the humanity switch.

Every inch of me through my mind and heart begs for me to believe that James is alive, because in truth I want to believe more than anything. It just so happens I've let myself believe once too many times in the impossible, and now I find myself numb to the surprises faith throws at me as my mind has been trained to treat it as if it were normal. I'm use to realizing that James is dead after seeing him in my dreams, and to think of him any other way is a lot more difficult than I imagined. It appears my mind has cried wolf too many times, but I plan to put everything at ease by the end of the day. I am determined to fix myself, because I'm tired of feeling helpless, tired of being broken. 

I don't waste any time setting my mind at ease, as I grab my car keys and call Theo from the kitchen seconds after James and Joel step out the door. I know their coffee chat will take a while, and although the drive back to Mystic Falls is just over seven hours, I pray I'll be able to make it back in time to avoid any pressing questions. I'll have plenty of time on the road to think of an excuse to where I've been all day. 

I buckle Theo in the back seat of my car before driving from the driveway straight to the highway, prepared to suffer one more day of confusion before I either sort my mind out or turn it all off.

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"Mommy, where are we?" Theo whines as I hold his hand through the forest. I had parked my car a while away, as currently we're several minutes deep into the crips evergreen forest. Just the sight of it all brings back memories of that night, the night where I supposedly lost my brother and gained back my James.

"The cemetery, buddy," I sigh, pulling him along with me.

We approach the Salvatore tomb house, which is just on the boarder line of Mystic Falls meaning I have to be cautious of every step I take, unless I want all the witch magic to be ripped from my body.

Just the sight of the old rusted down tomb brings shivers down my spin, but I force down the lump in my throat and search around, my eyes scanning the names of every tombstone near by until they land upon the one I came here for. It's a shiny marble stone, not even two years old with the name James Branson.

I hear a crack of a branch from behind me, followed by light footsteps, alerting my attention. "Mommy, someone is here," Theo says fearfully, tugging on my sleeve. Instinctively I feel a great rush of fear for Theo, my motherly protectiveness coming out as I feel the veins form beneath my eyes.

I turn and push Theo behind me whilst still holding his hand and bare my fangs only to realize it's Caroline. "Blair?" she gapes, holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers in her hands.

"What are you doing here?" I ask her, allowing my vampire features to disperse.

"I could ask you the same thing," she breathes out, obviously still grieving from the loss of Bonnie.