Starstruck - Shawn Mendes / boyxboy

Chapter Thirty-Five: I'm Here

Jacob's POV

I held onto my mom's hand as she was unconscious on the bed. Dr. Grey said she was going to wake up soon, and I don't know what I'm going to do.

My mom, the light of my life, my knight in shining armor, the person who I strive to be everyday, has brain cancer. You think about it all the time, you see videos of people finding out they have cancer, but you never think it'll happen to you but here we are.

"How is she doing?" Michele asked as she pulled a chair next to me.

"Still sleeping." I answered, "I don't know what to do if she dies."

"She isn't going to die Jacob." She said putting her hand over mine in comfort but I shook my head.

"You don't know that, she is the only reason why I'm alive right now. She's the only family I have left," I paused as I wiped the tears that were starting to form, "where am I gonna go?"

"You can stay with me, my parents love you, you're like their own son, you also have Shawn, he'll understand." Michele explained, and I layer my head on her shoulder.

"I can't believe this is happening to me, to us. We were just getting our lives together. My mom found a stable job, I've been happier and nothing bad has happened to me in awhile. I've been genuinely happy, but now this. If she dies, I don't know if I can take it." I explained truthfully.

"Jacob, don't you dare. You've come so far from when we began. You were hurting yourself, you were beating yourself up in your head, but now you've never been happier! This is just a bump in the road." Michele spoke, and I nodded in response.

What if she does die? Would I be able to handle it? If I break down, and go down a dark path again I might end up going too far because of how much this will affect me. If I was gone, Michele would be fine, she has acquaintances and family. Shawn and I haven't even been together that long for him to be affected by me not being here.

"How's everything going?" A voice said, and I looked over to the door to see Dr. Grey walking towards us.

"I've had better days." I said as I looked back to my mom, and I heard her sigh.

"I know this must be hard for you both,
but don't worry, we will do our very best for the both of you." She explained.

"What's the plan for her?" Michele asked, and I nodded in agreement looking over to her.

"Well, she has a tumor in her head," she started as she showed us a tablet with her scan on it, "the white part right there is the tumor."

I'm not going to lie, I wanted to cry even more, because the thing growing in her head was the scariest thing to me. It's not a small tumor, and I held my mom's hand even tighter.

"Wow," I whispered quietly, voice cracking.

But I know, I had a feeling that this wasn't the worst news that she had. I looked up to her and saw sorrow written on her face, and I felt my face pale.

"The tumor is in a risky spot. If we surgically remove it, there is a high chance that she won't make a full recovery." She explained and I whimpered, a tear starting to roll down my face. I felt Michele grab my hand, but I couldn't move, I couldn't speak.

"What if we leave it alone?" Michele asked.

"It will continue to grow. She will eventually wake up, but we can estimate that she has around 14 days before it will damage her brain further, and could lead into brain death." Dr. Grey explained and I pulled my hand away from Michele and my mom to cover my eyes.