Supernatural Imagines (On Hiatus)

Light of Your Life-Castiel

The Winchesters can't help but stare at you in sadness as they stand in the hallway watching you from it. You were an absolute wreck right now both the boys obviously knowing that it broke their hearts even more. They just didn't know what to do or say to make you feel better. What do you say to someone who just lost the man they love?

You are currently laying in your bed snuggled into a pile of blankets while some sad movie is playing one that neither Winchester knows but can already tell you that the dog dies. You are sporting some heavy under eye bags from not sleeping and your hair is messy from obviously not being brushed for quite a while. You are wearing some sweatpants some random t-shirt and are currently clutching his coat tightly in your hands like it's your lifeline.

"Hey, Y/N." says Dean cautiously as he steps into your room with a totally forced soft smile

You don't respond too scared of speaking thinking if you do you might just break down.

"We-we went to the store got some of the cookies you like......and the special expensive ice cream you always ask us to get. It's in the kitchen if you want some." says Dean hoping to at least get you to speak or to hopefully get you out of your room but that might be a stretch for right now

"I'm....I'm good." You choke out hesitantly with a small crack in your voice keeping your eyes on the screen

"Are you sure? You want us to bring you anything some water?" offers Sam softly trying to be gentle knowing right now you are fragile

Neither of the Winchesters has seen you like this. Normally you are this badass hunter who never gets shaken by things or scared. So this is a whole different ballpark to how you generally are.

You shake your head in response but the boys were still glad at the same victory they had. You talked which is better than yesterday and the day before.

Both Winchester's give small nods before they exit the room closing the door behind them.

"You think she's going to be okay?" asks Sam looking at his brother with concern for you in his hazel eyes

Dean sighs before running a hand down his face.

"I don't know, Sammy, I don't know."
answers Dean with the same amount of concern

You are like a sister to both Winchesters now. You have been hunting with them since the beginning and both boys love you.

"I don't know." repeats Dean softly wishing he could help you

You shift on the bed to lay away from the door and once the boys are gone you break. Tears flowed down your face rapidly as soft sobs escape your lips. You trying to keep somewhat quiet so the boys' don't hear you, you don't want to worry them more. You clutch the tan coat in your hands tighter taking a small sniffle of the fading scent on the shirt that makes you only cry more as it reminds you of him.

"Castiel." You whimper softly feeling the gigantic hole in your heart somehow grow, even more, you didn't even know that was possible.

Castiel is dead-dead meaning he is gone forever and you would never see him again. It's been a whole entire month since he died, a whole agonizing month. There was no one way of getting him back. You knew no one demon would do a deal with you since you are apart of the Winchester clan. So there is nothing you can do to get him back and just knowing that made you feel hopeless. That there is no hope of seeing him again...that you would never see the man you love again, the man you thought you would be with together.

You finally drifted off to sleep a couple hours later due to being tired from not getting proper sleep and from your tears.

You stood next to Castiel walking home from a date the two of you managed to get in between the craziness that is in both of your lives. You were holding Castiel's hand tightly in yours with your fingers intertwined with his while you smiled up at him. Castiel is currently talking to you about how he was around for the making of the first milkshake.