Rookywriters Book Reviews

Review 2 @kintenara

Book: A Sacrifice To Remember
Author: Kintenara

REVIEW

1. First chapter blues

*  Summary / prologue - The first part of the summary is good. There's no need for that second part where you wrote about the intrusion of the secretary. You're letting too much information out. Just the first part is okay to make readers want to find out the rest on their own.

*  Intro to main character - Intro to the female main character in chapter one, was shortened. Kendra is the main character, we need to know everything about her if possible. Not just about her waking up late, going to work, or thinking about Liam, and the same with Liam.

*  Intro to story - There was no proper intro to the story. I understand the use of dialogue in passing information but readers will want a little paragraph summary on what's happening with the storyline.

*  Intro to genre - First chapter said little about the romance part. But we need lot more spice to it.

2. Story Settings

*  Description - Description of places help fill out chapter holes. This was lacking in first five chapters. Kendra's room, her neighborhood, location of her workplace, the building was not properly described.

*  Theme - Theme of romance is not boldly expressed. If Liam and Kendra are dating before the book started, readers need to know full details of how long, how far, how strong they're together. What plans they have together, all this little infos fill up the chapters not only dialogues.

*  Intrigue / Suspense factor - There's no suspense obvious at first, probably because the chapters are fast paced and short. So readers already know what to expect. But then instead of suspense there was more surprises as each chapter rolled out, which was good. But not all readers will have the patience to read out where the surprises is leading up to.

*  Relation to genre - The story description is related to the romance genre.

*  Time setting - Well written.

*  Character development - Take your time to build your characters information in each chapter of the storyline.

3. Story Tone

*  Grammar - Paragraphing was good. There are some punctuation errors like adding full stops after dialogues. There were super long paragraphs in chapter twelve. It will be more readable if those paragraphs are broken to bits.

*  Dialogue - Dialogues took almost all the part of your chapters. In some instances, you can just tell us what characters discussed, there's no need stretching it to long conversations.

*  Choice of words - Good diction.

*  Chapter flow - The chapters flowed nicely.

*  Writing voice - Your writing voice was coming up gradually as story progressed which is a positive sign of developing your writing skills. .

4. Creativity

*  Plot development - Chapters one to ten seemed rushed. The first ten chapters of your book is supposed to lay a full foundation for what is to come. If it is rushed readers get tired easily. And because the chapters are short, they contain scanty information of what they are reading. Don't expect readers to know everything happening behind the scenes.

*  Writing style - Writing style was great.

5. Personal thoughts - A sacrifice to remember, had a nice gripping story line going on. The title tells it all, the book cover tells of the triumph and celebration of love at the end. The plot explores the unique love story between Kendra and Liam told from their point of view. The story was nicely plotted and if the writer can fill up the spaces with more information, it would be more gripping. Though much of the actions took place at later chapters.

* Overall - You have a beautiful story, readers will only be impressed from what they read about in the first five chapters. If they are not impressed they will probably not continue reading. Polish your first five chapters if you can.

Beautiful work. I'm giving it an 8 out of 10.

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