My Sweet Devil - JENLISA

Chapter 44 : Broken

LISA'S POV

I never understood why all hospitals had to be the same color; off-white. It was already not a joy to go there but if they didn't make an effort on the decoration, I can assure you that it was depression. The corridors with numbered doors running along them, the smell of the different drugs hitting me in the nose. It was certainly psychological but the smell made me uncomfortable, I felt weak and miserable. Nurses or relatives would walk patients who were sitting at the back of their wheelchairs with their empty stares as if they could see the end of the road, the end of their lives. 

Although I am in good health, I was not mentally fit. A few days ago, I had a fight with Ruby Jane and it wasn't the first time we had a misunderstanding, but this time it was more serious. We had gone on to the crazy lovers to two strangers who did not understand what the other was trying to get at. That day, I tried to contact her but I was still getting her voice mail. I thought she probably needed some space and it would irritate her even more if I tried to reach her. However, my anger reappeared in the late afternoon. Mina had come to visit Yaya's father. She was accompanied by her husband and her husband's brother. I didn't really appreciate their presence, but I couldn't say anything. However, I almost made a huge mistake when this Akiko guy opened his mouth. He proudly claimed that he had just left Ruby Jane. Indeed, they had been having coffee together when I tried to call her all afternoon. It took me a lot to stay calm, something that certainly didn't go unnoticed by Yaya.

The image of Ruby Jane giggling at her stupid jokes drove me crazy. What was she playing at? Was she deliberately making me jealous because if she did, it was successful. But I had no reason to be because we were not a couple. I didn't know what we were, we never put labels on each other and we never discussed it. Now that I think about it, besides sex and flirting, we've never said to each other I love you, not even a I like you.

Although she didn't answer my calls, she still replied to my messages but it was always very short. As soon as I tried to apologize, she would stop the conversation. The case only made the situation worse, I was constantly frustrated and could get angry for nothing. I realized this not long ago and I immediately regretted it. Lia begged me to take her for ice cream because she was bored after school, especially since Yaya was often in the hospital with her father since his condition needed to be closely monitored. Being the only one in charge of everything, I became stressed and afraid to forget important tasks like paying bills. So when Lia kept turning around me while I was finishing editing my pictures, I literally exploded. I felt bad when I realized that I had put all my frustration on her. She was about to cry so I took her in my arms and apologized. I promised myself that this kind of situation would not happen again in the future. 

In short, it was tense between Ruby Jane and I and I didn't know how long it was going to last. If only she could understand how I felt...

I was finishing talking with the nurse who came to change Mr. Sperbund's oxygen air tubes and explained to me the evolution of his state of health. Unfortunately, the news was not nice to hear, Mr. Sperbund was getting weak as the days went by. His condition quickly worsened, which I find hard to believe, that a few weeks ago he was standing right in front of me talking to me. 

Concerning Yaya, she had huge rings under her eyes. It had taken a few more years in only two weeks. She didn't talk much and was not eating much. I was worried especially when our daughter asked me if everything would get better. 

"Honey... you should eat something. There's a lot of food in the hospital cafeteria. I'll stay here until you finish eating at your ease, besides, Lia stays at her friend Yu Na's house. Mr. and Mrs. Hussey are aware of the situation and they are happy to keep Lia for the weekend," I stroked her hair trying to soothe her as her hands were shaking. I understood that she might not want to leave her father alone since he is the only family member left. But I'm sure his father wouldn't be happy to see his only daughter in this state.