FINE LINE | HARRY STYLES

NINETEEN.

DECEMBER, 2017. CONT.

Christmas has never been sadder.

I debated staying home. I didn't want to go to my parents' Christmas party, but I knew they had hoped I would. I just didn't feel up to it.

But, I knew I'd let them down if I didn't at least make an appearance.

So, I threw on a red dress and Ubered down to their house.

I had friends. I had people to talk to. But, I had never felt more alone.

Blair was talking my ear off. Mom and Dad kept shoving food my way. Francis and Claudia were trying to make jokes to get me to laugh. None of it was enough.

I felt so shitty for being so distant, but I just wanted to be alone.

Apparently they invited Harry. If he's smart enough, he won't show up.

But, my heart keeps asking for him. And my eyes keep looking for him.

He never came.

I should be glad. But I'm not.

I spend the night there. Just so I could be there to spend Christmas morning with them.

I lie in the guest room bed, staring at the ceiling blankly. The door opens, exposing a small sliver of light into the room.

I turn the light on and see Francis near the doorway. I scoot over and he joins me under the covers.

"I didn't want you to be alone tonight." He tells me.

I shoot him a grin and pinch his cheek lightly.

"You're a gentleman."

Francis turns to me and holds the pillow close.

"Love seems scary."

I laugh, "It is."

"Why do you think he did it?"

"I said some things I shouldn't have. I think he just wanted to get back at me."

"You think he liked doing it?"

I pause. I don't even know how to answer that. So, I simply shrug.

"I'd hope not."

-

I am pathetic.

It's Christmas and I'm miserable. I'm trying to keep a happy face, but it's getting harder and harder. Because he could've been here right now.

Sitting next to me as we watch everyone unwrap gifts. Kissing me when he's bored. Wearing cute pajamas.

Fuck this holiday.

I sneak more vodka into my eggnog and down it, shuddering at the bitterness.

After all the gifts are open, I sit back and watch the twins mess around with their presents.

"There's um...there's one more gift." Mom announces, walking into the living room.

She walks over to me and places a box down beside me. I glance at her, confused.

Everyone watches as I tear the card from on top, immediately recognizing the handwriting. I open it quickly and read the letter.

To you, Sunlight

Nothing I could do or say will ever make up for what I've done. I can't apologize enough, Soleil. I hope you know, I love you. No matter what, I love you. Believe it or don't. You were the one for me and I will never forgive myself for hurting you. It's always you. It'll always be you. I wish you the best of luck in everything. In life and in love. Maybe you'll find someone worthy of you. Because I never was. All I ask of you, is to never forget you who are. And please, never forget Paris.

We'll always have Paris.

With love,

H.

I open the box, my bottom lip quivering.

A box of my favorite macarons.

There's a smaller box on top. I shakily open it it, revealing the shiny necklace inside.

A diamond cherry dangles on the chain.

I burst into uncontrollable sobs. Mom and Dad hold me as tightly as possible.

But it's not enough to put me back together.

END OF ACT I.

***

Okay so that's act one! Sorry it was so short :/ I don't know when exactly I'll be starting act two but I know what plans I have for it. So to whoever is reading: I'll be back. So yeah, until then!