chapter one.

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Kenny - Monday Morning

Riding down the streets of Southpark, I dig my hands deeply in my hoodie pockets. Stan has his hands on the wheel as Kyle is arguing with Cartman. Fucking senior year of high school and these douche-bags are still fighting. Snickering, I listen to the pointless argument whether or not the teacher would check the homework or not. "Did you do the homework?" Cartman asks me.

"Yeah, why?" I respond.

"See fatass!" Kyle flicks Cartman's forehead, "Even Ken did it!"

We collectively walk into our homeroom, before sitting down I almost get nailed in the head by a paper ball. Everybody's laughing, talking and in no state to listen to our homeroom teacher. Leaning back in my chair, Cartman insults Kyle again as Stan desperately tries to calm them down.

Clyde walks up to our table and I raise my eyebrows, "What are you fuckers arguing about?" He asks our table, nonchalantly. I scoff.

"They're arguing about the fucking chem homework," I answer, "What the fuck do you want, fuck-boy?" Clyde rolls his eyes, shoving his hands in his jacket's pocket.

"Look, I heard you did the homework, McWhoremick," He leans on my table, "The teacher's gonna fail me if I don't have the homework. Dude- I just really need the homework."

"And why the fuck would I give it to you?" I bite the inside of my mouth, eyeing Clyde.

"I'll give you anything. I'll hook you up, get you laid, give you shit, anything!" He practically begs me, "Please Kenny."

"Anything?"

"Anything."

"Fine- I'll give you the homework if you hit me up with a pack of cigarettes and-"

"There's more?" Clyde gawks.

"Give me pretty boy's phone number," I close one eye and point directly at the black-haired, blue-eyed Craig motherfucking Tucker. Clyde turns around to look at who I'm pointing at he, before turning back to me with his eyebrows raised.

"Tucker?" He bites his lip, grinning.

"Oh yeah."

"Fuck you," He sticks out his hands, "It's a deal, then?

"Deal, Donovan."

Craig - Monday Morning

Clyde walks back to our table, a stack of papers in his hand. He slides into his seat, and slams the papers on the table making Tweek jump. Jimmy raises both of his eyebrows looking at Clyde, "W-w-w-what's up?"

"I got the homework from McCormick," He announces and I snort, clapping sarcastically, "But I had to make a deal with him, he asked for a pack of cigs and-"

"Wait, there's more?" Token rolls his eyes, "What is it?"

"You're not gonna like this... Craig," Tweek, Jimmy and Token all simultaneously turn to look at me as Clyde scratches the back of his head, "Kenny wants your phone number."

I scoff, rolling my eyes, "McCormick?" Clyde nods, "Flex." Almost immediately locking eyes with Kenny, I look at Stan's table. He holds up a peace sign with his hand before placing it against his mouth and sticking out his tongue. Snickering, I wink sarcastically.

Wiggling his eyebrows, he turns away, leaving me to speak to my friends, "You're not mad?" Clyde looks at me.

"Nah- I don't mind."

"Okay class!" The teacher claps his hands, "Head to first period!" I swing my bag over my shoulder as I follow Token and Clyde to English. Nodding at Tweek and Jimmy, before heading out. Sliding into my assigned seat in the back, I watch the students flow into the classroom.

"Cartman," I sigh, looking at Eric as he sits down at the desk next to me, "How's the girlfriend?" I grin, purposely trying to fuck him up.

"Fuck you, Tucker," He spits, "At least I had a girlfriend."

"Looks like we both forgot about Red," I scoff, "I think that's for the best."

"Fuck off with your snarky-ass attitude, what's hyping you up to mess with me?" He asks me, leaning back in his chair, "Is it Kenny asking you out?"

"What? Are you jealous?"

"I-I'm not a fucking fag!" He exclaims, defensively, "Asshole."

I roll my eyes, "Never mind, did you do the homework?"

Before Cartman can answer, the teacher closes the door, "Good morning class," She announces, "Today we will be starting our annotations and paragraphs on the literary devices in the book. So I hope you all brought your notes to compare with a partner."

The class celebrates, but I just sit back, uninterested, "Finally English class is looking up for us!" Cartman cups his mouth to shout.

"However," The teacher raises her finger and the entire class groans, "I have arranged partners, please when I call your name raise your hand to allow your partner to locate you and vice-versa."

"Eric and Token, Wendy and Red, Scott and Bebe, Craig and Clyde..." The list drags on and everyone raises their hands, and so do I, "Everyone please partner up and get started comparing notes and annotated papers."

Walking up to Clyde's table, I pull a chair and I sit next to him, "Fucker."

"Motherfucker," He smiles, "Are we really going to compare notes?" I shake my head, leaning back in my chair, "Thank fucking God, I'm not friends with a nerd."

"Okay, Clyde," I laugh.

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