Johnlock Oneshots (Requests are closed)

Of Protracters and Rulers

My friend and I were joking about being straight as protracters. We're both Asexual biromantics.

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Johns POV

Sherlock and I were in the flat talking to Greg. Sherlock had gone to get evidence which was in his bedroom. When they were left alone Greg turned to me. "You two dating yet?" he asked with a grin.

"What brought this on?" I groaned.

"Well, it was mostly Myc's idea," Greg replied.

Mycroft and Greg had been married for two years, surprising everyone. "Again Greg I'm as straight as a ruler." the words had barely left my mouth when something hit me in the head.

I yelped and turned around. There was a protracter on the ground. Sherlock gave Greg the evidence, a bloody hairbrush, and Greg left. I glared at Sherlock. "What was that for?" I asked.

He walked over to where the protracter now rested. "You were wrong, you're about as straight as a protracter," he said and walked into the kitchen.

"W-what?" I gasped a bit shocked.

"You're obviously bisexual. Or pansexual. I've caught you staring at men the same way you look at women." he called from the kitchen.

I sighed. "Of course you figured it out," I said.

He popped his head out of the kitchen to look at me. "You don't deny it?" he asked.

"Well, I don't think I even can." I chuckled.

"Why don't you say something then?" he asked making his way over to me had caught his attention.

"My parents are extremely homophobic. They kicked Harry out of the house when she came out," I said.

He nodded and walked past me into his room. Probably going to his mind palace.

Three weeks later I started going out with men.

Two months later I started dating Sherlock after he kissed me out of jealousy.

A year later we had gotten married.

4 months after that I punched my father in the face after he yelled at Sherlock.

Life was good. All because Sherlock threw a protracter at me.

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REGUEST!!!