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I was sitting on my balcony smoking a fat ass blunt with Ajai, I just sat there thinking about Gwen, I imagined her beautiful face & us making love for the first time. It hurt knowing she wouldn't tell her parents about us.
"I fucked up badly with Simone I love that girl & she having my babies" she puffed smoke.
"What about Lisa?"
"Man I don't want her crazy ass, she been calling me her Pussy wasn't that good to loose my girl over" I passed the blunt.
"Well at least she ain't hiding her sexuality"
"What's up with that what you going to do about it?"
"I have no clue every time I bring a girl home or even look at a another female all I see is her face" I shook my head blowing smoke.
"Damn you got it bad"
"I know but look at this" I grabbed my phone & showed her this picture of Gwen & Grant
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"Why can't that be us Jai, she wants to be with me but she's to afraid to be herself."
"I don't know Lo just give it time okay she will come to her senses." I heard the doorbell, I got up going to the door opening it seeing Keyshia she looked so confused & distraught.
"Hey girl whats wrong?"
"Long story" she said walking in going to the balcony, I followed behind & sat down next to her
She explained everything that was going on, her problems were more serious than mine or Ajai's.
We all sat together & laid on each other, we were all going through things & we had to be here for one another.
****** Today was Gwen's wedding & I was going to talk to her one last time before she walked down the aisle, I pulled up to the church & walked in seeing it all laid out it was nice dont get me wrong.
I saw Gwen's parents & her mother smiled walking toward me.
"Hey Honey how are you?"
"I'm okay can I talk to Gwen?" I asked looking around
"Yeah sure she's getting dressed." She led me to the room where Gwen was, I entered & saw her standing there in a white dress looking at herself.
"Wow you look beautiful" she turned around at the sound of my voice,
"Thank you" she whispered, I walked closer to her.
I touched her beautiful face softly.
"Don't do this Baby, if you don't want to."
"I don't want to parents hurt them Londyn "she whispered kissing my hand.
"But you hurting me instead, I love to much to give up on this"
"Do you love him? Tell me you do & I will never bother you again." She looked away starting to tear up.
"I can't" she backed away, I grabbed her by the waist & kissed her softly, kissing back she put her hand on face.
"Hey it's time" I heard Karen say I backed away from her.
"Oh I'm sorry, Hey Lo" she awkwardly said.
"Hey"
"Gwen it's time to start" Gwen nodded & looked down.
"I should go" I whispered & walked out, I saw Ajai & Keyshia standing there talking.
"Hey Lo what are you doing here?" Ajai Asked looking at me concerned.
"I had to see her one last time but I'm not staying I gotta go"
"Lo" they hugged me tightly, I back away from them on the verge of tears.
"For Real I cant stay" I said about to walk out the door when Gwen's mother grabbed my arm.
"Your leaving?" She asked
"Yeah I just came by to say congratulations"
"Come on Londyn you can't leave Gwen would want you here" she said, I groaned knowing this wasn't going to end well.
***** The music started playing for her to come out I just looked down the whole time, Keyshia grabbed my hand giving me a reassuring smile.
Gwen came out smiling & her father looked so happy to give his daughter away to her husband, They made it to the alter & grant grabbed her hand smiling at her.
The wedding started & Grant read his vows & now it was Gwen's turn.
"Grant, you are an amazing man, you do everything that I ever wanted in a man" she stopped & looked at me.
"Babe you okay?" He asked.
"I can't do this"
"What do you mean?" He asked, everyone was shocked.
"Grant you are a perfect man but this is not were my heart is" The whole crowd gasped.
"Gwen What's going on?" Her father asked.
"Mom, Dad I did this because this is what you wanted but I'm not in love with Grant, I'm in love with a person that sees me for me & doesn't care about my flaws. They love me no matter what & if you can't except that than you can't just stay out of my life" I was so surprised that she said all that.
"Who is it" her mother stood up.
"It's me" I stood up & said, everyone looked at me & some people gasp & some were so shocked.
"What no way you are not gay Gwendolyn!"
"Yes I am & I'm proud of it" she walked toward me & grabbed my hand pulling me into her & kissed me deeply.
I didn't care who watched us, I was happy that we could finally be together was in the back of my mind I knew that something was not right.
