if i could fly | zach

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by talkmarais

by talkmarais

based off of
'if i could fly' by one direction

Zach tossed and turned in his small bunk on the tour bus, finding it seemingly impossible to fall asleep. The rest of the guys were down and had been sleeping for a few hours, but he remained wide awake. It had been almost three months on tour. Three months without seeing your sweet face in person. The both of you knew that being apart for months at a time would be hard but he didn't expect the dull ache in his chest that came with missing you. Zach checked his phone for the time and debating calling you, but he knew that you weren't awake at this hour. As much as he wanted to hear your voice, he didn't want to wake you. Instead he decided to just close his eyes and let the images of the two of you flood his mind. He reminisced on some of the best memories of you and him, times that felt like he didn't know anything else other than that he loved you. Times that made him feel like you and him were the only two people in the world.

"Y/N, I told you I don't wanna talk about it." "Zach, please. It's just me. You don't have to pretend like you're okay." you said, standing at the foot of the bed while he laid down on his phone. He put his phone down, looking at you standing there with your hands on your hips. "I'm scared." he shyly admitted. You sat down on the edge of the bed, "Of what?" you asked. He sighed and rolled onto his back, covering his face with his hands. "I'm scared that if I open up or talk about how I feel, you're gonna want to leave." You frowned, moving up the bed to sit next to him. "Why would I want to leave?" you asked, and he didn't respond. You gently grabbed his wrist and moved his hands away from his face. "Zach, you don't have to hide from me." He chewed on his bottom lip, turning his head to make eye contact with you. "I just don't want to be a burden and bring you down when I'm feeling sad or upset. I don't want you to get sick of hearing me complain or rant and want to leave me." he said quietly, sadness in his eyes. Your face fell at his words and you held his chin, kissing his lips. You pulled back so you were only inches apart. "I promise you, I'm not going anywhere. You're not a burden and you don't bring me down. Everyone gets these feelings and it's better to talk about them than to just hold it all in. I'm here for you, and I love you. You know that right?" you assured him and he nodded, a sad smile on his face. "Thank you." he whispered, giving you another kiss. "I love you too." "Of course, babe. Now, I'm gonna lay here with you and if you feel like talking, you can. If not, it's okay. I'm gonna be right here either way." you said, cuddling up to him.

"You're ridiculous." Zach chuckled, shaking his head at you. "C'mon! I wanna go!" you whined, making your best puppy dog eyes at him. It was the middle of the night and you wanted to go to the beach. Zach thought you were crazy but part of him wanted to go just because of how excited you were about it. "Alright, alright fine. Let me put on my shoes and we'll go." he sighed and you giggled happily, kissing his cheek. "Yay!" Fifteen minutes later, the two of you were at the beach walking through the cool sand. You walked hand in hand, swinging your arms dramatically. "The stars look so pretty at night. I love L.A. but it's so beautiful when everything is still and quiet." you gushed, and Zach looked at you adoringly. You were always so honest and raw when you talked to him, it was one of his favorite things about you. You just spoke whatever was on your mind and you never tried to hide from him, even if what you were saying was completely random or didn't make sense. You thought about things from a whole different perspective than he did, you were fascinated by things that he didn't think twice about. Zach was always left in awe of you. "You're the most wholesome human being on Earth, have I ever told you that?" he said and you laughed, holding onto his arm and leaning on his shoulder. "Shut up, I just like the stars." you teased. He bent down slightly and held his arms out behind him, "Hop on, we're going to walk in the water." You grabbed his shoulders and jumped onto his back, wrapping your legs around his waist as he held your thighs. Zach walked towards the water and let it touch his feet. He let out a gasp. "Holy shit, that's cold." he exclaimed and you laughed, laying your head on his shoulder. "I don't wanna feel it." you said and you felt Zach's hands slowly let go of your legs. You wrapped your legs around his waist tighter and tried to pull yourself up. "Zach, don't you dare" you warned and he laughed, pretending to drop you and catching you. "You wanted to go to the beach!" "You wanted to go in the water!" you protested and he smiled, stepping back onto the sand and letting you down. "C'mere." he said, pulling you into his chest and kissing your forehead. You hugged his torso and took in the warmth of his body against the brisk breeze of the ocean. He rested his cheek on the top of your head, "I wish we could stay just like this forever."

Zach sighed, opening his eyes again. He was getting overwhelmed at the mere thought of you, knowing that he couldn't have you in his arms right now. He decided to call you even though it was late. The line rang and you picked up almost immediately, to Zach's surprise. "Baby!" you cheered on the other end of the line. "Hi, angel. Why are you up so late?" "Why are you up so late?" you shot back and he chuckled, "I miss you." He heard you sigh and fall quiet, making him nervous. "Y/N?" he said quietly and you sniffled. "I miss you too." you said sadly, the tears in your eyes welling up. "I've been up all night just thinking about you and us and looking through my camera roll and listening to your voicemails. I couldn't fall asleep." you croaked out. Zach's heart broke a little bit hearing how sad you were, but he also felt warmed at the fact that you were missing him as much as he missed you. "Oh, baby please don't cry. I know, I'm doing the same thing. I've been awake for a while." he said, laying on his side. "If I could fly home to you right now, I would. Trust me, I've been debating it for the past two hours." he said, a light chuckle escaping your lips. "I just want you home. I'm so proud of you but god Zach, I miss you a lot." you said, laying down on your back. "I miss you more. How about I just stay on the phone with you 'til you fall asleep, hm? Will that help?" he said and you shut off your light. "Yes, please." you said and you both moved so you were laying with your phones next to your heads. You laid there in silence for a while, just listening to the sound of each other's breathing. "Zach?" you said, unsure if he had fallen asleep or not. "Hm?" he mumbled sleepily. "I love you." "I love you more."