Divine
It is morning, around 9am and both Astaroth and I lay wake, listening to the sweet chirping of birds, the calming wind that is blowing outside and the wonderful light coming from the sunlight. It is indeed a beautiful day.
I take this picturesque day as a symbol of starting a fresh. To accept what has happened in the past and move on, yes death is not something that we all can cope with. It is painful, devastating and sometimes it feels so unreal. Death is something that we can't run away from. Death is someone who will knock on your door eventually though sometimes we are lucky enough to dodge him. Death is something we should all expect but that doesn't mean we should live our lives in constant fear or in constant sadness. I have dealt with the pain and I'm ready to be happy again and be grateful for all the little things. I'm going to live my life the way I want to only being surrounded by positivity, however I will accept the negativity once in a while- a challenge from the world.
"How are feeling today?", I'm pulled out of my train of thoughts and self affirmations by Astaroth's speaking. I pull away from him and lie on my stomach, intertwining my fingers together.
A sigh escapes my mouth. "I'm okay.", I say honestly. "I've accepted the past and I'm ready to move on...I think I can handle it now.", he smiles at my words, the pride twinkling in his eyes.
"I'm not going to lie.", I continue. "The pain is still there but it's bearable now."
He nods in understanding and rolls out of bed, telling me to prepare myself and that we will make our way to the mall after breakfast.
As the door shuts behind him, I figure that I might as well just get ready.
After my long hot shower, I dress myself in some casual clothing that consist of black leggings and a black oversized hoodie, paired with some black converse. After that I put on some light makeup and have my hair in a messy bun. Just as I finish I walk out the room.
The hallways still look the same as last time, nothing has changed. The hallways are as quiet as could be with only a few guards on duty. I smile and wave at them and they return it with a curt bow. This action surprises me but I choose to play it off.
I reach the dining hall where we have our meals and all eyes are on me, shocked faces staring back at me. They must have not been expecting me. I smile nervously and make my way to my seat, feeling somewhat uncomfortable by all the attention I'm receiving. Sheng clears his throat and everyone resumes to their ingesting their breakfast. I mouth a him a 'thank you', he returns it with a small smile.
"Hey, it's good to have you back.", Allison says as she takes my hand giving it a gentle squeeze. I smile back but it's faint. I assume that everybody has heard what happened, either from being told or hearing my sobs.
Just as I'm about to dig in I am mindful of the empty seat that belongs to Nefarious, maybe he's late?
I nudge Allison to get her attention. "Where is he?", I ask referring to her brother.
She looks at me with sad and worried eyes. "He's probably in his office. He hasn't really...been himself to say."
I scrunch my brows in confusion. "He hasn't been eating much.", she adds on and my face drops for some odd reason. With the state that he put me in I shouldn't even care but the good in me is worried and concerned about the devil.
As I carrying on consuming collation my mind drifts back to Nefarious no matter how hard I try not to. He hasn't been eating, taking care of himself. What he did to me was brutal and heart breaking but I can't help feel the way I do. Any woman in her right mind would not dare to care for his minor suffering...unless she cared deeply.
Do I care just as deeply?
I don't want to but...
I sigh out, trying to push back the thoughts of Nefarious.
"Oh by the way.", Allison sticks her hand in her pocket, pulling something out. "Here's your phone. You left it in Roman's room the other night and I brought it down just in case I were to see you today.", she says handing it back to me. I take it from. "I charged it too.", and sure enough my phone is on 100% the screen bright with a picture of me, Roman, Rea and Allison as my wallpaper.
"Thank you.", I say smiling gratefully at her.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
"Finally! I haven't been to the mall in over what, six months.", I say in complete glee, the biggest smile taking over my facial features.
Astaroth let's out a laugh shaking his head. "You are here to shop, so where to first?", he questions looking at me expectantly.
"What's the budget?", I ask not wanting to go overboard and spend all his money. I'm not going to lie I do feel a tad uncomfortable. Why? Because I'm not used to spending other's money and furthermore I'm an independent woman.
"Please don't insult me Divine, I could buy you this whole entire fucking mall and it wouldn't make a dent in my account.", he boasts giving me a smug look.
"Haha okay then. I'll take your word for it. Then let's start there.", I say pointing at forever 21.
3 hours later
We have been shopping for so long that I got shopping bags that were two many to even count. My feet are aching but my proud female nature refuses to admit that while Astaroth is trying by all means to not explode.
I look at him, studying his annoyed and tired expression.
"Shall we get some food?", I propose and he instantly sighs out in relief.
"Yes! My feet are killing me."
I giggle at his whining and tell him that I feel like a burger with some fries and a shake. He instantly leads us to the food court and sets my items by a table and I wait for him to order our lunch. Suddenly my phone starts ringing and Roman's name flashes across the screen.
"Hey what's up?", I speak into the device.
'Hey. I was just checking up on you. How's the shopping spree?'
"I'm having so much fun spending your brother's money. Poor fella is really exhausted.", I reply back watching as Astaroth comes back with our food.
She giggles on the other end. 'I hear you. None of the men in the mafia like to shop, well unless if it's buying guns and other deadly weapons.', we both shudder and the thought.
"I'll talk to you later. My food is here.", after our goodbyes I hang up and start munching on my fries.
"Who was that?", Astaroth ask.
"Your little sis."
"Which one?", he quizzes as he takes a sip of his soda.
"Roman."
He nods his head and just continues eating, making small talk here and there until we finish eating. "Ready to go home?", he asks hopefully and I decide to mess with him a bit.
"No not yet, I actually wanted to go to five more stores.", I say batting my eyes innocently as he has his mouth agape.
Not being able to keep up the act and having difficulty containing my laughter, I burst out and reassure him that I'm all done and that we could go home.
*************
What I'd do to go have my own shopping spree right now😂😂
anyway hope y'all are staying safe
much love💜
Azura☆
YOU ARE READING
Nefarious (Tainted Love)- Mafia Romance || BWWM
Romance"What did you see?", he asks as he takes menacingly slow steps towards me. "I didn't see anything.", I lie while backing away from him. We continue our little game as I take a step back he takes a step forward. We do this until my back hits the wall...
