Where It All Started

Case One: 4 Days Left

~Edythe's Pov~

I wake up bright and early, early as in 6am. I couldn't get the images of those girls out of my head. They haunt my dreams. The wicked ways they were treated just moments before their deaths. I think of how a human, someone like me being capable of something so vile, but then again I used to do vile things to. I may not have enjoyed it like these sickos do, but I am desensitized in some ways, I can be extremely cold at the flip of a switch. I'm trying to get my humanity back. I get up from bed and walk over to the bathroom turning the light on. I turn the facet on and stick my head under it and sip some water. I splash my face with water and look at myself in the mirror. I knew this job was graphic, but I didn't expect to see something so crazy this soon. It's a fast paced job and they all see things like this everyday. I wonder how well they sleep at night considering it's only my first day and I've only slept a couple of hours.

Since I'm awake I decide it would be best for me to take a shower now and get ready for the day. I wash my hair, body and face before stepping out of the shower into the cool air. I dry off my body before looking into the foggy mirror. I take my hand and wipe it across the mirror making myself visible. I don't always connect with the person looking back at me. I am so sure of who I am, at the same time that I have no Idea who I am. I am a mask. I am a woman that plays her role in whatever one she is given, but not of those roles ever feel truly like it belongs to me. I brush my teeth, because the bathroom was hot and steamy I decided to get dressed in the room. I grab my go bag and unzip it. I dig around the bag looking for my deodorant, lotion and perfume. Once I find it I pull them out sitting them on the bed. I then pull out black jeans, a white shirt and a blue jacket to get dressed in. I find my brown booties and a pair of socks. 

I grab the lotion and squeeze the lotion into my hand then rubbing it over my entire body, I get dressed quickly and then put on perfume and deodorant. I brush my hair out and let it hang loose for now. I grab my file from the night stand and sit criss crossed in the center of the bed. I open the file and go over everything since yesterday. We have a profile, now we just need suspects and to catch this guy. Aaron says to be optimistic about the case and soon we will catch the unsub, though I don't find it that easy. I think about the gore and guts I have seen in my days. I think about the literal blood that would stain my hands and hide it's way under my nail bed. I begin picking under my nails like I used to, desperately trying to get the blood out from under them. The image of the first life I took flashes before my eyes. A man sitting in a meeting with my father, ready to poison and betray him. Oh, how I wish I had just let him back them. I snuck up behind him and placed the Glock right on the nape of his neck, one swift hand motion from him and I pulled the trigger. A blank expression never leaving my face. Not after I was splattered with all of his blood. My blank expression held strong through cleaning up his mess, dismembering his body and discarding it. I groan at the thought of the girl and what she could be going through right now in this very second, while I'm sitting here on my ass doing nothing. I'm thinking about the pain of the victims already killed. Did these girls feel the same way about Vikram when he knew his life was over? I get up off the bed and slip on my shoes. I grab my keycard for the hotel room and head to Aaron's room and knock on the door hoping 7am isn't to early for him.

I wait for a minute or so before the door opens and I'm meant face to face with a languorous Hotch. "Sorry." I apologize quickly feeling guilty for disturbing his sleep. "did I wake you?" I ask my voice barley above a whisper. "Yes." He speaks in a low raspy voice, you can tell that he's still extremely tired. "Sorry.." I mutter again. "I can come back later it isn't very important." I state. He looks me up and down a few times before stepping aside and letting me in. "Are you sure? I could let you sleep, if you need it.." I trail. "I figure it's important if you have the case file with you." I nod and walk inside. He closes the door and I turn to face him finally realizing he's shirtless. I admire his body before shaking my head clearly my thoughts. I came here to try to save these girls, and a little bit for my own selfishness too, trying to rid myself of my horrific past. Maybe just maybe if I do enough good in this job it could cleanse me of my sins. I just hope that they won't drown me before redemption.